h a l f b a k e r y"Bun is such a sad word, is it not?" -- Watt, "Waiting for Godot"
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Could this be called a Pig-kab? |
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I think this would have been better as an annotation on
some other idea......[+] |
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Great! That's the marketing jingle sorted out. |
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I love the idea - I would however, like to raise a technical query addressing streaky bacon. |
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The "streaks" in a pig run around the same axis about which we are rotating our Schweinefleisch - it is the lateral cut through those alternating layers of meat and fat that provides the familiar bacon pattern. Using the proposed method, these streaks would be transposed into great long alternating sheets of fat and lean meats, fine for a giant, but streaky bacon it aint. |
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//thin pig, thin pig.// sp. new pork, new pork. |
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will this bacon have legs?? |
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what about bones? and guts. I love bacon but don't prefer to have slices of pig bladder and clavicals in my breakfast. |
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See [links] for possibly adaptable technology. |
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This would work better if the pig could be
reconfigured by selective breeding. Domestic pigs
already have extra vertebrae compared to their wild
ancestors. What we need to do next is breed them to
have shorter (preferably no) legs, and a central spine
rather than one located on the top. |
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With any luck, the trachea would realign itself to run
more-or-less axially down the new cylindrical pig.
This would simplify the mounting of the pig on the
bacon lathe. |
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Would it be easier to modify a breed of pigs to have no legs and be more cylindrical, or to modify a breed of snakes to be fatter and taste of pork? |
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The problem is that most animals (including snakes)
taste like chicken. |
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I think it ought to be possible to develop an aquatic
pig, which would be likelier to evolve a legless,
quasi-cylindrical form. An eel-pig is a distinct if
distant possibility. |
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Well, if imminent catastrophic global warming and dramatically higher sea levels worldwide provide the evolutionary pressure to create this aquatic pig, then at least that's one positive outcome. Glass half full... |
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The problem with this is that you would be planing off sheets of either just meat or just fat. The magic of bacon is that it's a cross-section of the pork belly. |
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