Auto Headbanger

It has come to my attention that a significant portion of rookie computer scientists spend a large amount of time banging their heads on their desks. This no doubt has a detrimental effect on their posture, eventually resulting in some kind of RSI, tennis elbow, or both. This could cost the employer money.

Smart employers, however, needn't be concerned, as they have all invested in Auto Headbanging Desks. Upon depression of the big red button, the entire worktop hydraulically raises and pivots to precisely bang against the operator's head (careful calibration is required), permitting said operator to maintain a perfectly healthy posture throughout.

Additional benefits include the automatic disposal of any items not bolted in place, and the option of a master remote control panel to satisfy the prerogative of casually despotic managing directors.