h a l f b a k e r y"Bun is such a sad word, is it not?" -- Watt, "Waiting for Godot"
add, search, annotate, link, view, overview, recent, by name, random
news, help, about, links, report a problem
browse anonymously,
or get an account
and write.
register,
|
|
|
Churches gotta evolve with the times.
This one is open 24/7 and entirely automatic. You get on a moving conveyor belt and will be carried along, past loudspeakers blasting out hymns, chants and scriptures. Along the way, at the appropriate time, a robotic arm shoves some edible paper into what the
computer computes to be your mouth and another dribbles some weakly fermented grape juice on your face.
A microphone gets thrust in your face and then you can confess your sins. Your voice gets analysed for pitch and a higher emotional level, if recognized, will require a correspondingly larger number of penances to be undertaken - this will get displayed on a large backlit LCD screen.
At the end, you drop your offerings in a slot and get off to the tune of the musical rendering of the benediction.
The inspiration
Conveyor_20Belt_20Church
That idea has the (human) priests on a conveyor belt. [neelandan, Dec 04 2008]
Acción Mutante
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0106215/
In the first half of the film a wedding is conducted by Robo-Priests in assembly-line fashion. Also features Robo-Security Guards. No conveyor belt though, sadly. [DrBob, Dec 05 2008]
[link]
|
| |
Erm, I like the robot sacraments, but other than the robo-bishop, isn't this kind of almost exactly the same as another recent (conveyor belt based) idea? |
|
| |
The automation does seem a bit harsher in this take - Could we try padding the robotic arms with something a little softer - I prefer my religion a bit more comfy thanks. |
|
| |
This was inspired by that <link>. However, this is for the solitary churchgoer who wants church at the odd hour and day, and cringes at the thought of mingling with fellow humans, yet wants some religion. |
|
| |
Aha! A coin operated religiomat, you could open one up next to the launderette. |
|
| |
With a baptism dunk-tank, like they have for applying primer on car-production lines [+] |
|
| |
Sounds like a design proposal for VaticanDisney ... |
|
| |