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For grammarians, pedants, aggressive spell-checkers and frustrated English teachers everywhere ...
The Apostrophe Shooter is compact enough to fit in a purse or pocket. Its unbreakable plastic casing will not trigger any metal detector. You can now solve the world's multiple language abuses wherever
you find them -- from billboards to print ads!
Your Shooter comes with three rotating ink cartridges:
WHITE: "Each widget fits in it's own case" ... POW!
BLACK: "Ladies Room" ... BLAP!
and RED: "Go Charger's, your the best!" ... POW! BLAT! BLAM!
... and a silencer, of course. Adjustable tip regulates the size of your corrective apostrophe, from Micro-Fine (magazine, menu, other text copy) to Mega-Splat (billboards, freeway underpass grafitti). Ink cartridge refills are free.
Now get out there and show that Apple sign who's boss!
It would have fun with some of these.
http://wesclark.com/ubn/
(Utah Baby Names.) [angel, Oct 26 2001, last modified Oct 21 2004]
(?) Grammatical vigilantism
http://www.timesonl.../article6799621.ece
Mr Gatward could do with one of these. [shudderprose, Aug 22 2009]
San Diego Chargers cheerleaders
http://www.nflteamh...s/cheerleaders.html
"...to be a lady at all times..." [normzone, Aug 22 2009]
[link]
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Speaking as a self-confessed pedant... I want one! |
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Would you like jam/jelly with your croissant? |
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Just make sure it doesn't fall into the wrong hands... think of the mayhem captain _ could cause with one of these... |
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Maybe there could be a license exam... |
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But anyway, my croissant's all yours. |
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I want one of those! I may not be great at grammar, but I would certainly have fun with it. |
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Lucy Brown would love this. |
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' so'm'e'body ' ' he'lp me' there's a' man'ia'c on' the
lo'os'e!' ' |
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as long as there are "potato's and tomato's" on the menu. |
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This could be the singlemost useful invention in the history of the world. |
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this is a spectacular idea. how soon do you think we could get these to market? |
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As a typographer, I am irritated
daily by people using the foot
mark [this typeface doesn't seem
to differentiate (and therefore
irritates me slightly)] instead of the
apostrophe. I'll take two. |
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+ for the Clint reference. |
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Pedants rejoice, the savior in the form of a little apostrophe-shooting widget has come! Long live the apostrophe...how would you insure that the mark was in the shape of an apostrophe? Still, it's a great idea, which is why I voted for it. |
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I'm gonna give you a fishbone just to be different. |
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[draws pronunciation pistol] BLAM! |
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[lobs in counterbalance bun] + |
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It needs its counterpart, the Apostrophe Anihilator, for correcting errant Greengrocer's Apostrophes and other such misdimeanours. |
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+ Please send one of these to some hb newbies... |
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//correcting errant Greengrocer's Apostrophes//
Dear God, the irony. |
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*Desperately tries to salvage some dignity* |
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Which niftily leads on to my other extension suggestion, the Apostrophe Mover, for correcting my above mistake. |
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At least he didn't say "Greengrocers errant." It would have given me the mental image of beaproned balding men wandering the countryside offering parsnips to damsels in distress. |
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These are you'r Apostrophe Shooters test or practice sentence's. Take some printout's of these sentence's and use the bullet's on these test subject's. Repeat till you'r shooting accuracy increase's upto acceptable level's. |
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I would have to get "two" apostrophe shooter's, one for me
and one for my "wife." |
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// I would have to get "two" apostrophe shooter's, one for me and one for my "wife."//
That reminds me, is the 'Gallery of Misplaced "Quotation" Marks' still going? |
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& what's with the "wife" all about? |
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oh, sorry [gnome] I was too busy looking at the misplaced apostrophe. |
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I know, I know, I can talk with all my absent capitals... |
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€ What happened to London? |
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