Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Anti Knock-A-Door-Run Device

Stamp out the menace of knock-a-door-run for good!
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Knock-A-Door-Run is a game loved (unfortunatly) by many an english child. It involves knocking on a stranger's door, then running away as the unfortunate home-owner comes to open the door to an empty doorstep. Living next to a school, you can imagine that Knock-A-Door-Run is the bane of my life. My Anti Knock-A-Door-Run Device consists of a small camera hidden in the door. This device is programmed to detect the cheaky smile traditionally worn by a child about to knock on a door and then run away. Once a Knock-A-Door-Runner is detected a photo of the culpuit to e-mailed to every local school, and a large tank of marmite is emptied on the cheeky scamp's head.
Shenton, May 15 2003

Ding_20Doh! [2 fries shy of a happy meal, Mar 07 2005]

(?) Memocam http://www.memocam.com/
All in one unit [Ling, Jun 19 2006]

[link]






       Put a microphone behind the door, at child's-knuckle height, and attach the biggest speaker you can find to it. Adult knocks, and all is well. Child knocks, and shits himself at the wall of sound. Problem solved.
friendlyfire, May 15 2003
  

       1) Put in an obstical course leading up to your door.
2) Mount a fake camera on the porch.
3) Get a gated fence. Lock the gate.
4) Get a pit bull. Don't lock the gate.
phoenix, May 15 2003
  

       I didn't realize I'm *still* an English child until now.
thumbwax, May 15 2003
  

       you woik in a school 44 weeks in a year, monday - friday, 8 - 4, with no friggin lunch break and the staff are as mad as the kids - so what do you expect come 4 p.m.? I need some fun, banging hard on some old ladies front door and legging it down the road so the Year 6 get the blame. hah.   

       ff - hah, foiled again.   

       phoenix - me and thumb know where you live.
po, May 15 2003
  

       TB foiled again. I like this game.
po, May 15 2003
  

       [po] Bring it on, you wee bit of red fuzz. I'm ready for ye.
phoenix, May 15 2003
  

       Have you thought of not answering the door during the time period just after school lets out? Hell, I don't answer my door at all! 9 times out of 10 its for the teenager and the other time its someone who wants to sell me aluminum siding, who needs that crap? If its really important they'll phone me, and I have an answering machine for that.
ato_de, May 15 2003
  

       Seconded. I never answer the door.   

       If someone really wants me they'll send me spam.
snarfyguy, May 15 2003
  

       Weight-controlled, timer-activated trap door. Not for use on Halloween.
Cedar Park, May 16 2003
  

       This is called ‘ding-dong-ditch’ here. - hehe - I solved it electrically.
Shz, May 16 2003
  

       When I were a lad <strains of "New World Symphony">, it was called "Knock down Ginger" - I don't know why.<sound of needle pulled violently off record>
friendlyfire, May 16 2003
  

       Didn't see this when I posted my own. [link]   

       Gingerbread we called it.
DrBob, Mar 31 2005
  

       Decorate your front garden with blood spattered school uniforms.
goldilox, Mar 31 2005
  

       Why marmite?
Mad Dog, May 02 2005
  

       Because it's less toxic than vegemite?
shapu, May 02 2005
  

       why not have a spring loaded front gate that swings shut when someone goes through.
andrew1, Sep 27 2005
  

       You could wire up a fake doorbell to said large tank of marmite, thus ruling out the need for the whole camera thingy ... It'd be funny when the Mother-in-law came around also.   

       Let's hope they hate it and not love it, eh?
Mrlemonjelly, Nov 22 2005
  

       I prefer to fence in my front yard, get a pit bull, and provide him with doggie doors between the front an back yard. Just let him out right before school gets out...   

       In Texas, and various other states in the US (Generally the more westerly, or southerly states) it is also popular to simply sit outside on the porch at this time. Some like to clean their fire arms in this position. A few of the more creepy ones prefer to have a bowl of candy ready for anyone willing to step inside for a bit. I reccomend the gun-cleaning routine, as waylaying children has more serious legal repercussions.
ye_river_xiv, Jun 19 2006
  
      
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