h a l f b a k e r yFlaky rehab
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Descending into the bowels of the city in order to board an underground train is not as quick or fun a process as it could be. What I propose is a slide running from ground level to the roof of the train's tunnel. The gate guarding the mouth of the slide would only be able to open when the train is at
the correct location, i.e. in the station.
On being given the 'green light', the fearless commuter would hurl himself down the slide, which would be initially steep but with the gradient easing towards the bottom for the purpose of deceleration before it emerges in the tunnel above the train.
A carriage would be provided in each train specially designed for people entering in this manner - it would have no roof and a mattress floor.
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Annotation:
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No, you wouldn't want the train to be in the station. If the slide levelled out as it reached the tunnel, this would convert your vertical velocity into a horizontal velocity. The slide would be designed so that your eventual horizontal velocity at the bottom of the slide matched the train's top speed (about 30mph?). You would drop into a train as it reached maximum speed between stations. |
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surely the trapdoor at the top should open just before the train gets to the station, so that it would be there by the time you've slid down the chute. Some underground lines are much deeper than others. (Alternative name: Tube Tube). Synchronising trains and trapdoors in this way is not something I would trust in the London system at present; I would probably go for it in Japan, though. |
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Note - the Northern line tracks are 220 ft below ground level at Hampstead Heath. |
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I was originally thinking of this as a bicycle ramp into the tube but couldn't think how to manage a safe 'landing'. |
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Anything - however dangerous - that removes the spirit-sapping, strip-light lit, orangey-brown tedium of waiting for the train to arrive at the subway station every morning gets a croissant from me. |
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Daredevil commuters will not have had all their early-morning vigour drained from them by the time they arrive at their place of work. So they will get more done. At least, that's how I'm going to tell it to the Council. |
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make a fantastic photo opportunity for the Blairs |
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I've had a simmilar idea when travelling through such stops as Covent Garden, with its endless tight spiral staircase, and thinking how much better it would be to slide down the banister. A good way to beat the meanderingly slow tourists and retain some of the energy you may (or may not) have before you get on the tube in the morning. Croissant. |
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....and what's wrong with the lift? |
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I have found that on occasion it has been known to breakdown. Just now and again. |
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how about, even better - access via fireman's pole?
the thing is, the slide idea works fine if the line isn't too deep, but with somewhere like Covent Garden, the tangent required to reach that depth would put the opening of the slide at street level several hundred yards away from the station! with a fireman's pole, you could have it immediately above the line, and vaseline hand cream could be available from dispensers at the entrance |
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TJF4375: You don't brake yourself on a fireman's pole with your hands - you grip with your arms and knees. But it's agood idea non the less. |
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To get daredevils out of the stations at speed, why not use the air pressure generated by arriving trains to force commuters up smooth walled tubes a la human cannonballs ? Trampolines at the landing points ....You would need different calibres of course .... |
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This would also improve the appaling ventilation on the LT system .... |
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The problem with fireman's poles is that they go straight down, which would cause problems when landing in the train. With the slide, your downward motion would be fast initially but then transferred into forward motion by the shape of the slide as you reach the bottom. You would then enter the train as per [hippo]'s first annotation. |
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Why not have the access slide go to the next station along? Then your actual journey on the train would be shorter |
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If you missed your train would it plop you down onto the tracks? |
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The trainspotter who can do the train leaves station aptitude test and/OR knocks your stupid head off through social engineering. Fool killer logs #88 |
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Almost 10 years... so near and yet... thwuk. |
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