Actual Elevator Shoes

There are circumstances where one exchanges one's usual footwear for special shoes, such as bowling alleys and certain hotels, and many people take their shoes off in the home.

There are such things as elevator shoes. However, these are not worn exclusively in elevators, and are not for that purpose.

My proposal is that there should in fact be such shoes. When you enter an elevator, the employee will ask you to remove your shoes and replace them with the specific elevator shoes, recently sterilised. You wear them for the duration of the trip, then shed them on reaching your destination. This has a number of advantages. It keeps the lift clean, provides employment, makes the elevator experience seem classier like a toilet/bathroom with an attendant, and levels the difference in convenience between taking the stairs and taking the elevator, thereby encouraging people to do the former, because it effectively slows down the elevator and makes it less convenient to take. It also creates ambiguity and confusion regarding the term "elevator shoes" and makes them more like what they sound like they are. These shoes will also actually be elevator shoes in the sense of boosting your height so that you can't buy the wrong kind by mistake. They have springs in the heels to allow slight reduction in the event of elevator accidents, for perception purposes rather than because they're actually likely, for people who are afraid of lifts.

Also available is the elevator shoe exemption certificate, for people who prefer to or must use elevators for whatever reason, to be presented to the elevator attendant on entry.