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All the health magazines tell us that having SUPER CUT abs is the way to go these days. You know, chiseled abs. Rock hard abs. The kind of abs that you can grate cheese on.
Well, I ask why workout if you can't show off your manly (or womanly) abs? My creation is the new Ab Window T-Shirt. It's
a normal t-shirt with a square window at the abdominal section. Now, you can impress all the ladies with your fantastic cobblestone abs without having to take your shirt off. You can look SUPER CUT and not get cold. The spin-offs from this technology are incredible. Perhaps, you have an impressive left tricep? Then get the new Left Tricep Window T-Shirt coming soon (patent pending).
Skeletees
http://www.skeletees.com/
[phoenix, Feb 10 2002, last modified Oct 04 2004]
[link]
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Superficial? Of course.... that's the point. Come on, man... don't you have killer, rippled, quarry-like abs? Everyone's doing it. |
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wow! this is an AMAZING idea! One more way for me to show off my cobblestone, brick, rugged, SUPER CUT abs. I think maybe a little flap is in line though, in case it gets a little chilly. |
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Ugh. Please, not while I'm eating. |
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If you got 'em, flaunt 'em. |
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I prefer a boyish figure myself, rather than something that looks like a whole mess of linked sausage meat. |
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If you had a plastic window, it might be possible to fix a fake muscle appliance below the window to give the impression of being really well-built, whilst still being able to spend all day on halfbakery. Otherwise, I know a few sites who can sell you semi-transparent latex clothing. |
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Replace the plastic window with a hologram. Tatoos optional. |
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I'll take the sausage, po. I'm superficial. |
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sausage man tends to be all brawn, no brain and thin skinned - am I generalising here?
BTW phoenix, the pelvis on that shirt seems remarkably high up on the body don't you think? |
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I'm superficial and facetious |
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I see an ad campaign for asexual t's. Corporate drudges are cornered and asked their opinion of nip or nav jewelry, grey skin, and Sha-na-Na. Mild embarassment to chuckles abound, then, "Gentlemen, show us your undershirts!" Next … |
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Perhaps you could even apply a small amount of dark pigment to make fake shadows that emphasize the distinction between the abdominal ridges (or whatever they're called), kind of like what they do to colored contact lenses to make them colored. |
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Ryan O'Neal and I-can't-remember-who, did that movie, roughly 1979-80, in which they made jeans with little plastic butt cheek windows. As low as jeans are getting now, the windows would seem as superfluous as, well, butt cheek windows on low cut jeans. |
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whats wrong with rips and cuts and holes? I think tallbloke is a bit of a wimp wanting to keep warm and show off his muscles in the first place. |
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Po... rips, cuts, and holes lack the pure silliness factor of a perfectly square window in the middle of a shirt.
As for being afraid of the cold... I run 5-10 miles a day outside in all weather conditions. |
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who are you kidding? po with small p thank you.
silly factor I like. |
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Get yourself a beer gut, TallGuy. Then you wouldn't need to mutilate your clothes in order to show off your manly physique. |
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Dr Bob I need surgery from laughing, oh dear, |
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Could the window have curtains? That way you could introduce your abs with lots of fanfare. |
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Sausage, huh? I better get workin' on those crunches. |
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Re 'sausage man tends to be all brawn, no brain' above; quote from TV film - female character responding to pick-up line from over-muscled male character: "Triceps are fine, medulla oblongata could use a little work." |
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I saw a kid once at the zoo wearing a t-shirt with a photo of a woman's bare breasts--right across his chest. I spose you could have a t-shirt for women with a man's chest on it. Just to confuse people. |
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So, does this mean that Britany Spears could finally wear a
shirt! THERE IS A GOD!!!!! |
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Guys generally lack the ability to show off their assets in the same way that women can. This seems like a great way to begin to address that problem. Although I'd much rather be seeing so fine jeans before ab window t-shirts. |
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Say what, duckie? How you figger? |
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Rear Window.
(this might save some time in the loo) |
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