Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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56k Tea Ceremony

 Zen and the art of slow modems.
  (+3, -1)
(+3, -1) 		  [vote for,
against]

Although I work in the city, I've just moved to a beautiful country pad. Calm and solitude abound, cable TV and broadband internet do not. So although I can bake at the speed of light when I'm at work, I've just installed a phone line and 56k modem at home.

I'd forgotten just how slow the connection is, and also how much time I spend staring blankly at the screen while it paints. Firstly, this is bad for my eyes. Secondly I get frustrated waiting, and disquiet my mind. Thirdly I end up munching on stuff while I wait.

So I've put my computer onto a beautiful white tablecloth. I've bought a beautiful small china pot, and some miniature cups, a tea light, and various teas.

Now each time my screen is painting, I see it as a meditation, and begin blending the perfect tea, really working on the flavours, and developing the ritual. It keeps my eyes from the screen, it diciplines my mind, and it keeps my hands busy too.

—Fishrat, Dec 16 2003

Chinese Tea Ceremony http://desires.com/1.4/Food/Docs/tea.html
[Fishrat, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]

DSL Satellite http://www.1800fastdsl.com/satellite.html
A little pricy for high speed. [v0rtexx, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]

still blending tea? http://www.halfbake...ix_20Mini_20Teabags
pick n mix is the way to go. [neilp, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]

[link]






       Try it where I used to live. 14.4 was considered fast. The line noise was so horrible that 9600 was the de facto speed. Broadband? DSL? Never heard of 'em. Moved to the big city now and lightning speed.   

       If/when I move back to the boonies, I will use this idea to keep from screaming and throwing things at the screen. [+]
—Klaatu, Dec 16 2003
   

       My old school tip: Surf by day, Download by night. I used to catch up with some house cleaning when I was a 56er. Needless to say I now live in a pigsty, I'm lucky I have a wonderful girlfriend who *actually* likes cleaning. heh
—v0rtexx, Dec 16 2003
   

       [Rods] Trouble is, it wouldn't have time to brew. Meanwhile, the squark of my model connecting is becoming like Pavlov's Bell.
—Fishrat, Dec 16 2003
   

       This sounds more like an exercise in Zen-inspired fashion regarding the white tablecloth and other accoutrements. If this were a truly Zen situation then you would have to recognise that all browser returns are essentially equivalent in their meaninglessness and that waiting for a return and viewing a return are equally valid pursuits - the only important thing is that you approach both with the same calm indifference and avoid treating the 'results' as more important than the process by which they are obtained. Ohmmmmn
—dobtabulous, Dec 16 2003
   

       Yes that's it [dobtabulous], except with the added bonus of tea.
—Fishrat, Dec 16 2003
   

       And maybe a nice doylee to make the whole affair a bit more English.
—Fishrat, Dec 16 2003
   

       I don't have a modem, but I'd buy that for a dollar. (Psst, [Fishface], where do you get your tea?)
—k_sra, Dec 16 2003
   

       what the devil is a doylee?
—po, Dec 16 2003
   

       It’s a little like an antimacassar, or something to do with Sherlock Holmes.
—AO, Dec 16 2003
   

       didn't they die out when there was an asteroid collision?
—po, Dec 16 2003
   

       The same as a doily, except misspel(led/t).
—FarmerJohn, Dec 16 2003
   

       [FarmerJohn]I prefer "creatively spel(led/t)" but hey ho. [AO] I think you should invent anti-mascara as soon as possible.
—Fishrat, Dec 17 2003
   

       There was me thinking it was someone who detested those guys who massage you while wearing rubber coats. All the rage in Soho.
—Fishrat, Dec 17 2003
   

       Fishrat is a pretty indepth name. Im curious what you you look like.
—northstar, Jan 07 2004
   

       More rat than fish, these days.
—Fishrat, Jan 07 2004
   

       A - I would likely spill the tea all over my keyboard B - It still involves eating, especially if you get those little sugar candies, the ones shaped like shells and things that are made especially to have with the tea, ooh they're so good C - ok, I agree, something more beneficial is needed to pass the time and this is the best idea I've heard
—mack2, Jan 07 2004
   

       spider solitare....that is my obsession! I have cable internet so there is not much waiting, but i seem to find time to "wait" and waste time playing that.
—babyhawk, Jan 07 2004
   

       mack2, I fear that there is no hope for you. Little sugar candy, tsk! Ruination.
—Fishrat, Jan 08 2004
   

       I generally play the guitar while waiting for the computer to do something, but this is good too. Or it would be, if the family did not leave stuff all over the desk. There's no room for the mouse to move, let alone doilies or Zen.

Have a croissant to go with your tea.
—English Bob, Jan 08 2004
   
      
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