h a l f b a k e r yA dish best served not.
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a snapshot in history.
Before the invention of the lightning conductor in 1752
An account holder at the 18th Century halfbakery wrote:-
“Lightning Umbrella” a device to go on the roof of tall buildings. it was totally scorned and cussed. the account holder deleted his account in a huff,
never to be seen again.
Before the discovery of a new planet in 1781
An account holder at the 18th Century halfbakery wrote:-
“Name a planet Uranus!” this was heavily fishboned as ha ha gross.
Before the invention of the jigsaw puzzle in 1767
An account holder at the 18th Century halfbakery wrote:-
“broken plate puzzle” – “what a waste of time and effort” was the only annotation to this – no votes. the newbie account holder told the assembled company that they all sucked and were stoopid and a total waste of space.
Before the invention of the self-winding clock in 1783
A certain account holder named farmerjack at the 18th Century halfbakery wrote:-
- well, he actually wrote half a dozen of them and they were all well-received. The auto-boner left his usual mark in a fit of pique & jealousy.
Before the invention of the spinning mule in 1779
A certain account holder at the 18th Century halfbakery wrote:-
“Spinning Mule” an adaptation of the drunken art of pushing a cow over, late at night; to cries of “cruelty to animals” and “baked”
Before the discovery of smallpox vaccination in 1796
A certain account holder at the 18th Century halfbakery wrote:-
“Smallpox vacation” advocating free holidays for smallpox victims. This was totally ignored as no-one wished to cough up the readies (in tax) for the venture.
Before the invention of the cotton gin in 1794
A certain account holder at the 18th Century halfbakery wrote:-
“Cotton Gin” an alcoholic beverage made from linen. DrBrownAle pronounced that it was impossible. Dipsy at the back had a fit of hiccups.
Prebakery
http://www.halfbakery.com/idea/Prebakery
by Zircon. [my face your, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]
Have a go.
http://inventors.ab...700s.htm?once=true&
[egbert, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]
18th century invention timeline
http://inventors.ab...es/a/Eighteenth.htm
[pashute, Jun 17 2015]
[link]
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Do you remember that idiot newbie "St3fenson" who reckoned that we should all travel around in steam-powered carriages - on rails? |
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Wasn't there a short-stayed newbie "TomJeff" who posted a WIBNI about an independant American nation free from British rule? |
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Before the invention of the 300 dog-power snowmobile in 1798
a certain Roderick Lyon at the 18th Century halfbakery wrote:-
“Shitsu Engine” a canine, belt locomotor; to cries of “here’s another bone for your tiny team” and “yapa, yapa, yapa” |
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I crave indulgence to recall to the assembled company the preposterous proposal that the works of Donne and his ilk be used in promotional publications! Of particular derision were the suggestions for Unruly Sun Window Drapes and Fleabite Chastity Garments! |
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We could get there by travelling in wicker baskets suspended below huge bags full of heated air, suggested [Mountain Golfer]
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Et le frère a dit le "non, vraiment, il sera grand!" |
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I rather enjoyed
the bloodletting of yore
which was toyed
by Baron Von Myfaceyour |
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"Proper illumination of MS Castle 3.11 requires the installation of at least 4 pecks of candles." |
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...and you'll have to get the glazier round to install Windows 1.8K |
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I am also reminded of the troll [jtull] who, in direct contravention of the biblical exhortation that seed be scattered by hand in random patterns, proposed a mechanism for breaking the sod, placing seeds in an evenly spaced pattern, and covering them again in one motion. The cad was duly hounded off, with a particularly memorable and witty quote from Mr Uniqueyokel "If God had meant us to drill, he'd have given us ploughshares for arms" |
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that [jtull] look remarkably like *jutta*, what a coincidence. |
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That was what alerted us to his troll-like nature in the first instance. That and his propensity for dancing around playing the flute. |
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As I recall, a regal woman who lost her head had once posted an idea about "cake for all" or some such nonsense. |
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And of course Mr Jenner who extolled the virtues of using cow pox to lessen the effects of small pox. Indeed they were strange times. |
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Don't even mention that Franklin fellow - "A penny saved is a penny earned" - pshaw! |
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Was it he that ..ah..coined the phrase "The penny is mightier than the sword"? |
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Well, he was known for praising common cents. |
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He's famous for remarking to the pondering Thomas Jefferson, "Here, a pen for your thoughts." |
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Next somebody will propose that Britain is ruled by Germans. Long live Queen Anne. |
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I thought that it was really ruled by a Scot.
FREEEEEEDOM. |
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As the Biro was only invented later ...isn't the phrase meant to be... |
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"The Penis , mightier than the sword. " |
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Perhaps proving that Viagra was around before the biro! |
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[2 fries]: That would be an Aussie pretending to be a Scot. As opposed to [PeterSilly]'s correct assertion of a German pretending to by English. |
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(later: Sorry [UB]: I can't believe I forgot that Mel 'Grecian 2000' Gibson was an American pretending to be Australian - much like the Martian Paul Hogan pretending to be normal. No aspersions were meant) |
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I liked it then, I like it now. + |
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Before the invention of the mercury thermometer in 1724 by
Gabriel Fahrenheit
An entry in halfbakery commemorates the late member
Brigitte Holtz who died of a fever, after trying her
thermometer on several ill people before trying it on her
own healthy self. |
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