There are an awful lot of places that have been "protected" by armed guards, lately. I've seen the National Guardsmen armed with M-16s at the airport. I've seen pictures of them on top of tall buildings in Orlando. I've seen them on TV, guarding the Golden Gate and Brooklyn Bridges. But I've never seen any armed protectors at another potential target: Disney World.

The reason is obvious, of course: people looking for an escape from reality in the Magic Kingdom don't want to see people in camouflage BDUs toting intimidating weaponry standing amongst cute animatronic puppets singing "It's a Small World." I really ruins the effect.

Still, reality is what it is, and I wonder if Disney is prepared to take drastic action if, God forbid, it is ever needed. To assist with that preparation, yet leave the public's minds at relative ease, I propose the manufacture of Goofy Gun Cases.

These would be lightweight, brightly colored parts that would fit on or over real guns, turning their deadly-serious, bad-for-business looks into something that is whimsical, playful and non-threatening. They should not change the accessibility, functioning or reliability of the gun; just the look of it. This would enable them to be carried by security personnel who fit the general theme of certain park areas.

Imagine security personnel at Disney World:

Tomorrowland: Dressed in Space Ranger uniforms (like Buzz Lightyear), security guards could walk around carrying H&K MP-5 submachine guns that are disguised to look like children's ray-guns.

Frontierland: Security here could dress like Davy Crockett, and would look perfectly normal carrying Remington 700s, slightly modified to look like friendlier versions of period weaponry.

Adventureland: Guards who look like the Pirates of the Carribean, carrying real cutlasses and duelling pistols.

Fantasyland: A crew could parade up and down this avenue dressed as the circus crew from Dumbo, leading an animatronic elephant. The elephant's head could conceal an M-60 .50 caliber machine gun, with the barrel concealed by the elephant's trunk.

Main Street USA: Have a few real policemen about, dressed in 1920's style uniforms. People would be less frightened, then, by their authentic Smith & Wesson police revolvers.
-- Guncrazy, Aug 25 2002

Gun wrapping service. Gun_20wrapping_20service
Cool cases might make them a little more popular. [ye_river_xiv, Sep 30 2007]

Yup, it's Guncrazy
-- thumbwax, Aug 25 2002


99% of the point of having a visible, nasty firearm is the deterrent effect ... hiding them obviates the purpose of having visible armed guards.

Having said that, squads of Imperial Stormtroopers with real weapons would probably be an effective deterrent .....
-- 8th of 7, Aug 25 2002


As opposed to invisible armed guards.
-- bristolz, Aug 25 2002


Look what I won as a prize, mommy!
-- RayfordSteele, Aug 26 2002


I still remember my first sight of a real, live weapon, which was on the hip of a policeman at Disneyworld. (I'd seen guns before, at arming recruitment drives in the high street, but they were not loaded and often disabled.)
-- DrCurry, Aug 26 2002


::Trys to picture armed guards singing along with the Small World ride.:: Seriously, though, shifts in there would have to be < 5 min's to avoid psycological trauma.
-- nick_n_uit, Aug 27 2002


Clip-on cases, that detach so you can scare people with them?
-- my-nep, Apr 04 2004


Better to simply have firearms concealed unless/until they're needed. Brightly decorated firearms that look like toys would likely be grabbed at by children who don't know any better; the required response from the holder of the weapon would not be pleasant for anyone involved.<p>

Concealed carry is much safer and more practical.
-- supercat, Apr 04 2004


They carry guns at Disneyworld?

"Oh my gosh, you killed Mickey!!"
-- DesertFox, May 05 2004


a fun idea till the toy and the gun get muddled up, Dad stops a robber with his child's gun his child goes out and play shoots his friend.
-- engineer1, May 05 2004


And at toon town, Marvin the Martian will patrol with his 9mm ray gun, and elmer fudd will guard the mean streets with a mossburg 00 buck shotgun tucked away in his blunderbuss.

Bugs will probably keep a .22 inside his carrot...

Of course, making the guards cute and adorable means they'll have to pose for pictures while the bad guys do their thing.

Despite all reservations, I'll bun this, on condition that your manufacturing processes be shared with the Virtucom Gun wrapping service.
-- ye_river_xiv, Sep 30 2007



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