h a l f b a k e r yIf ever there was a time we needed a bowlologist, it's now.
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Why stop to open the door when you can merrily stomp right over it? Counterweight or spring-load a door along the bottom, hinging to allow it to swing down to the floor in either direction. A gas cylinder to retard return to closed position keeps it from attacking the second person through.
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you would also have to ensure that the areas on either side are clear, which would be a good thing. Maybe have black and yellow caution stripes on the floor, deliniating the space where the door will come down. |
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People get hit by regular doors all the time and no-one
demands that the areas through which they swing be
marked with warning stripes.
I like this... but it has to be a sturdy door with loose
hinges so it crashes down loud and dramatically. (It would
eliminate the option for slamming the door behind you
when you leave. Perhaps you could have a regular door
for slamming closed beside the downward swinging door.) |
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How 'bout loosing the hinges entirly, and attatching the door my means of tiny strings at the four courners. You kick the door entirly out of the frame for your very dramatic entrance; then a couple of minutes later, the strings retract bringing the door to it's upright position. Works for both coming and going. |
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The problem here is that everyone gets to be dramatic... so, the next logical step is to take the door above (with the strings and all), and add hinges from which the pins would be removed unless the person begins to turn the door handle, at which point the pins are mechanically inserted into the hinges causing the door to be opened normally and very undramatically. |
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um.... many doors are made of glass... have fun! |
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What if you're going the other way through the door after someone's just stomped it down? You'll get hurled out across the photocopier and into the drinks machine or possibly through a window. I like it. |
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I like the dramatic possibilities. It seems to me that this would invite the entrance of wild-eyed, shirtless men, yelling "STELLLLAAAAH!" |
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I think a mix of sirrobin's annotation (instead of a sturdy door, merely paint it so it looks sturdy and rig the door to a speaker which makes the crashing sound) with LittleBitONothing's (strings at four corners so you could kick it off the frame) would be cool. The technology exists and is currently in use: the "falling bridge" at Universal Studios. |
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Would the shirtless men be included with the door, or purchased separately? |
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I'd have to get one of these installed in my garage. Scare the hell out of my neighbours as I drove through. |
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What happens if two persons approach the door at the same time from opposite sides? Does one see the other get hit over the head with the door, and nobody gets anywhere? Or does the door have motion detectors and refuse to crash down when there is somebody on the other side, so you get an endless "you first, no you first, no after you sir"? |
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Still, I think the dramatics outweigh the possible practical problems. Croissant. |
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flying doors, sounds of distant explosions, drama. |
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<Bill & Ted> Excellent </Bill & Ted> |
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