Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
This would work fine, except in terms of success.

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wife repeater

save your voice and sanity
  (+4, -9)(+4, -9)
(+4, -9)
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a small portable computer screen with two big dials.one says ENTER the other REPEAT you speak into it and press ENTER you position in front of other half preferably at face height. the volume should be fixed and not be able to be adjusted. Other half can then keep pressing REPEAT to his hearts content. You can get on with life the universe and everything.
grannymop, Oct 19 2007

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       rant - sorry, whatever sex you are.
po, Oct 19 2007
  

       so, sort of a spousal Tivo?
bleh, Oct 19 2007
  

       po.there is a great big clue in my name as to my sex.   

       I would appear on screen and the motivation would be every time other half felt compelled to say ''eh?'' he would press the repeat instead. You obviously don't all suffer the same problem as I do! so give it a few years.
grannymop, Oct 20 2007
  

       yeah but its all a bit obscure...   

       what is this a screen?   

       why don't you just go off and have a great lesbian affair that blows your mind and helps with the sudoku?   

       wife repeater just sounds like a blokish title...
po, Oct 20 2007
  

       I tried that one last week but it didn't really help anything.
grannymop, Oct 20 2007
  

       Good job! Or, you could pay some woman with a megaphone to repeat your message over and over. Close enough.
Shadow Phoenix, Oct 21 2007
  

       What?   

       Men lose their ability to hear high pitched sounds as they age. I believe this evolved as a survival mechanism.
nuclear hobo, Oct 22 2007
  

       Now where's that anno bunning button when I need it. That's a good one Nuke.
ye_river_xiv, Oct 22 2007
  

       Yeah, ha. Women talk too much! Men don't listen! Where but here could you find out such valuable information? Other than in every single sitcom produced since ca. 1950?
jutta, Oct 22 2007
  

       Hmmm....If I were to marry a triplet, then let's say, something bad happened to her. Just, you know, life is like that sometimes. Then I married her sister. And again something unusual occured. Not foul play really, just, unusual. Finally I marry the third sister..... Yes. Repeating wives.
Noexit, Oct 22 2007
  

       Say what you will about Gambler's Fallacy, I would be very circumspect if I was the third sister.
Texticle, Oct 22 2007
  

       don't eat the feckin' mushrooms.
po, Oct 22 2007
  

       I'd take the triplet sisters, three triplet three-somes, in my cruisin' Hermes-Pegasus.Biz methanol-hydrogen MPV, each a seat for them, and I'd be off with the missus in the Ferrari Californiaiaiajay !!!
sirau, Jun 10 2008
  

       Eh? [+]
Wrongfellow, Jun 10 2008
  

       [-], I prefer "single shot" wives... no, wait... can I get one with alternate translation functions... like a Babelfish or something.
FlyingToaster, Jun 10 2008
  

       Couldn't you do this with SMS?
pertinax, Jun 11 2008
  

       I said, couldn't you ...
pertinax, Jun 11 2008
  

       Never mind.
pertinax, Jun 11 2008
  
      
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