Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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speaking treasure map

 talk to me you sucker
  (+1, -5)
(+1, -5) 		  [vote for,
against]

This is a treasure map for the dislexyic pirate or appropriator of treasure maps. Most pirates i know have serious difficulties with their A B C's. This map converts the clues contained within the map, into the spoken word. Thus allowing the dislexyic to hunt down the lovely lolly with the ease and precision of their literary accomplished counterparts. I suggest this idea in the spirit of 'fair-play'.
—garlic twins, Dec 14 2001

Braille maps for those who can't read http://www.the-foru...phemera/braille.htm
[lubbit, Dec 14 2001, last modified Oct 21 2004]

female pirates http://www.katyberr...rianne/pirates.html
no tripe talking his usual....... [po, Dec 16 2001, last modified Oct 21 2004]

[link]






       I thought that's why pirates always have reading parrots on their shoulders.
—st3f, Dec 14 2001
   

       You don't have words on a treasure map, just a sketchy outline of an island. Even pirates know the letter X.
—pottedstu, Dec 14 2001
   

       Even better: Treasure that uses a map to find you.
—sven3012, Dec 14 2001
   

       something to do with oh yes now I see the light
—po, Dec 14 2001
   

       It's interesting how (according to the garlic twins) ocean-going pirates have difficulties with their spelling, while the modern version of the pirate, the warez d00dz, seem to have just as serious problems. Perhaps we need speaking warez sitez also? Or perhaps the genes for piracy and illiteracy are linked?
—pottedstu, Dec 14 2001
   

       I'm sure the mis-spelling of 'dyslexic' is deliberate.
—angel, Dec 14 2001
   

       I'm not.
—lewisgirl, Dec 14 2001
   

       They could also use braille (link).
—lubbit, Dec 14 2001
   

       reading writing (and arithmatic) are not qualities you'd look for in a pirate. Sixteen men on a dead man's chest, pieces of eight, yo ho ho (sic?) and a bottle of rum? Picked up along the way rather than in a classroom I think. Pottedstu's right, the letter X is self explanitory. I wouldn't recommend patronising a pirate or he'll (there weren't any girl pirates) make you whelk the plonk you lubber(s).
—notripe, Dec 16 2001
   

       see link, tripe
—po, Dec 16 2001
   

       "FORTY SIX PACES FROM STONE SHAPED LIKE A CUSTARD TOWARDS WHERE THE LIGHT OF THE SUN FIRST RISES..."

"Arrrr, Matey"

*Bonk*

Thud

"Arr HarHar"

.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

"SIXTEEN PACES TO..."

*Bonk*

Thud

So on and so forth
—thumbwax, Dec 16 2001
   

       Blimey, it seems there were a lot of female pirates. And there was me thinking that maidens of the high seas were mainly erm beards for Bluebeard and the cabin boy. I stand corrected and keelhauled.
—notripe, Dec 16 2001
   

       you have a nasty turn of phrase; work on it; 2/10
—po, Dec 16 2001
   

       I do
—notripe, Dec 17 2001
   

       Why restrict it to speaking treasure maps? I want to see speaking prosthetics catalogues & speaking parrot food recipe books.
—stupop, Dec 17 2001
   
      
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