h a l f b a k e r yProfessional croissant on closed course. Do not attempt.
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Imagine a football sized porcelain ball, attached to a flexible stalk. THis is nounted on the ground . Cut a 4 inch diameter hole into the top. To use, stand directly over it, and pull it towards the genitals until the business end is directly in the hole, then pee. Up market versions could include
a warm water spray for washing up, and a warm air dryer to avoid those annoying drips.
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oooooh, flexible stalk. are you sure about this? |
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Well, if not exactly flexible, something like those umbrella covers, with different size tubes sliding itside each other. |
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And how long is this thing going to last with a bunch of gorillas kicking it into place. Also I am not letting my bits get that close to a bit of bacterial growth medium that twenty other guys have been rubbing their bits across in the last hour alone. |
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A lot of guys will just stand back a foot and try to hit the hole. |
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Ah, in that case I withdraw my bone. |
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How about an electrospray urinal?
Electrospray is used as a means of
spraying a very fine jet of liquid from a
nozzle by electrostatic repulsion.
Basically, you put a huge voltage on the
liquid, and it tries to get away from
itself by forming a pointy cone and
ejecting very tiny and very highly
charged droplets therefrom. |
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So, just have a platform in front of the
urinal, connected to a van der Grraaff
generator. To ensure the droplets
(which will be a very fine mist) go the
right way, apply the opposite charge to
the urinal. |
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[MB] You are NOT connecting a high voltage cathode there. No. Just No. |
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That's the point - you don't need to. Just
stand on the platform (you may have to
remove rubber footwear). Also, the risk of
a direct stream-mediated conduction
between yourself (at + Hwaan kV) and the
urinal (at - Hwaan kV - or vice versa) is
negligible: the stream breaks up into very
tiny droplets, which will themselves break
up into even smaller droplets; hence, no
short circuit. |
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/You want me to stick my WHAT in WHERE!?/ |
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/You mean touch it? Ewww!!!!!!/ |
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Sorry I just wanted to preserve those comments in case you delete your anno. |
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+1 I think I would like guys to stick their dumbsticks in this. |
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Well as long a THis is nounted properly I guess its ok. |
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One could always avoid spills just by sitting instead of standing. |
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Unless you have morning glory, in which case it's best to do a handstand. |
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I'd be tempted to put a bunch of flowers into it. |
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[MB] - I had to struggle not to laugh out loud at your "electrospray urinal" - it needs posting as a separate idea. |
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Except for the take your shoes off bit. (being one of the stand back and try to hit ther hole types myself) |
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