h a l f b a k e r y"It would work, if you can find alternatives to each of the steps involved in this process."
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The Dictionary says that the plural of trachea, also known as
a windpipe is also trachea or commonly tracheas.
US president Trump now has a political opponent, a well
respected and capable former US vice president, Joe Biden
with his running mate, a former attorney general for the State
of
California and prosecuting attorney, Kamala Harris.
In comparison to his political opponent, Trump will suffer if he
continues to have only one trachea for making political
comments about his adversary. Trump now needs more than
one trachea if he wishes to have a chance to successfully
defeat Biden and Harris who are known for their competence,
knowledge and ability to govern.
What is proposed here is a medical procedure for Trump, to
rearrange his trachea into multiple tracheas. When healed
having multiple trachea will enable Trump to speak out of
more than one trachea at the same time. Simultaneous
comments by Trump about his political opponents will greatly
boast Trump’s credibility and popularity and increase Trump
chance for reelection by those who still listen to him.
[link]
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Perhaps swap the new trachea for his larynx? Twice as much
huffing-n-puffing, but no drivel spewed forth... |
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I thought he was already using his descending colon for this
purpose. |
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I'm seeing a short-armed shoggoth. Is that where you were
going with this? |
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Could enough such duplication offer simultaneous speeches
in other languages? |
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I think you misspelled trachea, regards the organ from
which Trump talks - if he wants to badmouth multiple folks
at once, what he needs is of course, multiple ani. |
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Ha, [zen_tom], you one funny guy. I hereby volunteer to
perform said trachea splitting surgery, done in a completely
sterile room with nothing but my fist shoved down his throat.
That should do it. |
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If you can tear him an extra anus that way, it would be even more impressive, and exceptionally scary. You might even garner a nomination for the Queen Boudicca Memorial Award For Extremely Frightening Persons Of The Female Persuasion... |
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// done in a completely sterile room // |
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Why ? You can wear gloves and surgical greens, and shower afterwards, shirley ? |
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Gloves make it kind of "draggy" going down the
throat. As opposed to my smooth skin. Get it? Good. |
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I was going to suggest shoving his OWN fist down his throat
instead, but with his Tiny Hands, it probably wouldn't
work... |
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[bliss] no! You're surely not qualified to perform this
particular medical procedure without backup? Then again,
the Orange Man is equally unqualified for his role, so it kind
of evens out. Two arseholes ahoy. |
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Hur hur hur... innuendo there... |
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You could use some sort of lubricant, such as copious quantities of warm lard... |
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<Gratuitous 'Deliverance' "Squeal like a pig !" reference/> |
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"Russian Collusion" sounds a lot like "Weapons of
Mass Destruction" or "Gulf of Tonkin Incident". Not
to jinx it, but it seems we've made it another 4 years
without invading anyone else. |
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So obvious, in retrospect, the answer was right there in front of us the whole time. |
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"Warm Lard", are you out of your... (whoops, almost
said it again)...are you crazy? |
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I'm Vegan. Can't touch it. Give me some good ole
Vasoline. |
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//"Russian Collusion" sounds a lot like "Weapons of Mass
Destruction" or "Gulf of Tonkin Incident". Not to jinx it,
but
it seems we've made it another 4 years without invading
anyone else.// |
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Yes, which is very disappointing. I think we need to have
an all out nuclear war with Russia
to
show Putin who's boss. Yes, some people might get hurt
but
think of how virtuous we'll look. |
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We also need to go to war with the Iran, Syria,
North Korea, the North Pole, the South Pole, the Moon,
Mars and Kepler-452b. |
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Time to get back to spreading peace and goodwill through
nonstop precision guided aerial bombardment. |
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//Not to jinx it, but it seems we've made it another
4 years without invading anyone else// - the run-up
to an election they're likely to lose is usually a
very popular time for autocratic leaders to initiate
a small, distracting war... |
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In this case, though, he seems to be going for a *civil* war, so
[sninctown]'s point about invasions would still hold. |
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I would like this idea if it weren't wrapped up in the daily anti-Trump rant. Tell you what. Make a daily anti-Biden rant and I'll bun them both. |
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//Yes, some people might get hurt...// |
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Really? If you think about it, a nuclear war would be
largely peaceful. The fighting could drag out to maybe...
a week? Would people get hurt? Well, for many, it would
all be over before pain signals got to their destination. In
terms of area under the curve, the graph of total human
suffering could look pretty good in that situation. |
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They've had it coming for some time. It's not much to ask
that they buy a few F16s now and then, but no. Silence. |
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They still haven't returned our bloody hedgecutters, either. Ungrateful, we call it. Them and their noisy parties, and interstellar spacecraft coming and going round the clock, and they fill up all the resident's parking orbits even though they don't have enough permits ... |
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Damn straight! And while we're at it, anal prob em right
back! Left front
too! |
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//They've had it coming for some time.// |
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And hey, don't even get me started about Proxima
Centauri b. Bunch of theoretical life-form bastards.
Multi-cellular? More like multi-stupidular. I say nuke the
hell out of them, existing or not. |
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//a nuclear war would be largely peaceful.// |
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I've always said, after a few flashes, the noise fades away
and nuclear war would turn out to be very peaceful
indeed. Hey,
close enough to ground zero you wouldn't feel a thing.
One day you're stressing about politics, the next you're
lazily floating about the stratosphere, not a care in the
world. |
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