h a l f b a k e r yFewer ducks than estimates indicate.
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It's a typical morning in New York, thousands of determined pedestrians making their way to their offices and apartments. An elderly man makes his way down the sidewalk, slowly passing a young woman in a business suit. Wide-eyed, he glances back at her, noticing a small insignia on her sleeve. Suddenly,
he turns around, whipping out a wiffle bat and bolting after her, swinging wildly. She laughs, taking out her own wiffle bat and prances away from the cackling geriatric.
In Madrid, a young couple chase after a gang of teenage boys, wiffle bats drawn and swinging. The news later reports massive wiffle riots in the streets of Spain, the cause inexplicable.
Masked suited men and women in Tokyo are spotted dueling with yellow plastic bats on subway trains, to the confused fright of onlooking commuters. They disappear before local police arrive.
This is the life of an international wiffler: live by the bat, and speak nothing of the bat, everywhere, anywhere, any time. Assemble teams or work alone, your goal is to confront and "defeat" (a swift conk on the top of the head) as many wifflers as possible. You can only join with an invitation from a consummated member.
Highlander ain't got nothing on me.
Home of the Wiffle Ball
http://www.wiffle.com/welcome.htm
They even have leagues for this! [Canuck, Oct 05 2004]
Nerf Bat
http://www.hasbro.c...9686/dn/default.cfm
Notice the celebrity endorsement. [Canuck, Oct 05 2004]
history of the wiffle bat
http://www.wiffleballusa.com/bats.htm
The original bat was of wood! [oatcake, Oct 05 2004]
croissant-patterned knickers
http://www.halfbake...atterned_20knickers
The more usual way of recognising kindred spirits [hippo, Oct 05 2004]
alternate weapon
http://www.halfbake...a/Throwing_20Monkey
[ato_de, Oct 05 2004]
[link]
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When you're chewing on life's sniffle
Don't grumble, play some wiffle |
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I'm more familiar with the term "wiffle" referring to a ball (link), not a bat. Perhaps this is a regional thing? Some websites that came up while searching for wiffle (I believe "whiffle" is an acceptable alternate spelling) talk about an aluminum wiffle bat. Even with holes in it, that would hurt! From your description, I guess you are referring to the old original bat they used to include in the Wiffle Ball set, a hollow plastc bat made fairly soft so it didn't inflict mass amounts of damage when used on little brothers, cats, and other household items. Today's equivalent might be a Nerf bat (link). |
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You're right, the term 'wiffle' is used to refer to the ball, not the bat, but out of sheer convenience I used the term interchangeably. And I was indeed referring to the plastic wiffle bat - most specifically, the yellow 1959 bat [link] - unless blunt trauma to the head is anyone's idea of good clean fun... |
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“I did it like this, I did it like that, I did it with a whiffle ball bat”. |
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I just saw a South Park clip of Cartman trying to beat Kyle to death with a wiffle bat for squealing ("I'm killing you Kyle, unfortunately I could only afford a wiffle bat so it might take a while."). Don't suppose you saw that same clip? |
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Wiffle ball bats for close range and throwing monkies if you have short arms. |
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I'm picturing the movie... trenchcoated, sunglassed combatants fighting it out in slo-mo "Wiffle-Time". |
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The first rule of wiffle club is that you do NOT talk about wiffle club.
Second rule of wiffle club is that you do NOT talk about wiffle club. |
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The first obligatory Fight Club reference... |
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Darn it, [kazmio], I was getting ready to post that...
[Waugs], something with a virtual super-hero? hmmm?
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