Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
It might be better to just get another gerbil.

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iPhone

Combine those popular new iPods with a phone. Call it the Apple iPhone.
  (+8, -17)(+8, -17)
(+8, -17)
  [vote for,
against]

Equip it to run various applications and play music and movies downloaded from the internets. Give it a nice touch screen interface too.

Plus it could be worn as a hat.

doctorremulac3, May 08 2005

It's THEM. From THERE. THEM
Shameless plug [moomintroll, May 09 2005]

Men In Black http://www.imdb.com...+vu+&Go.x=14&Go.y=9
[DrBob, May 11 2005]

iPhone hat https://www.cultofm...nds-and-glare-free/
[pocmloc, Feb 15 2022]

iPhone hats https://www.iphonen.../iphone-head-mount/
[pocmloc, Feb 15 2022]

[link]






       It wouldn't work. When the spy satellites read it, they will increase the power to the mind control rays.
Aq_Bi, May 08 2005
  

       Well, maybe somebody could write an application to prevent that.
doctorremulac3, May 08 2005
  

       I wanted to say something but I'm not sure what.
SpocksEyebrow, May 08 2005
  

       Were you going to suggest a built in camera? Because I was just thinking that.
doctorremulac3, May 08 2005
  

       THEY live in two realities at the same time, denying YOU access to the one you KNOW you live in. They read your MIND all the time, occasionally changing memories of real events with IMPOSTOR memories that they invent in order to LAUGH at you. YOU KNOW IT IS TRUE. They use synchronicity and neuroplapsic programming to USE your brain and confuse you with THEIR rules. The RULES change every time you THINK about them, but can be remembered by LEARNING not to THINK. This is what THEY want us to do. It is only by “improbing” your memories with your own FAKE ideas that you can think without mental process, giving you access to the SECONDARY, TERTIARY and PENTITENTARY levels. BUT they will ABBERATE you by DISTURBING and CONFUSING you with thoughts and emotions t5hat are NOT your OWN!!!! THEY enter your nightly DREAMS through symbols, archetypes and hypnosises. YOU KNOW this IS TRUE. Some of us are THEM already, but DO NOT KNOW it. TWELVE RUNGED LADDER OF SIMUL-TRANSI-TIME FURTHER MOVEMENTS CURTAILED BACKSTAGE FORMATION WAR FORCASTS. you are still a PRISONER of THEIR language, and can't find your way out of the MAZE. they will LABEL this page for you mind DECONSTRUCTING their "AURIC SACRIFICE DOCTRINE". They are not afraid to use false mirrors and shadow reflections. TWELVE ZIRGOTRONIC GALAXIES inhabit the TIMECUBE. , we must UNTIE together, those of us who are UNTAINTED by their DEFILEMENT.
zen_tom, May 09 2005
  

       LIES. IT'S ALL LIES.
zen_tom, May 09 2005
  

       //we must UNTIE under the SAME banner//
already there, brother. I stopped wearing ties years ago.
Zimmy, May 09 2005
  

       All hairdressers are in employment of the government. Hair are your aerials. They pick up signals from the cosmos and transmit them directly into the brain. This is the reason bold-headed men are uptight - likewise suits and ties.
zen_tom, May 09 2005
  

       You all laugh now, but go and work in the NSW Public Housing Comission.
Detly, May 09 2005
  

       [zen_tom] David Icke is, er, either an impostor or really quite ill.
david_scothern, May 09 2005
  

       If I spike you, you'll know you've been spoken to.
calum, May 09 2005
  

       That's almost a Withnail & I quote.
david_scothern, May 09 2005
  

       David you terrible knut! Even a stopped watch tells the right time twice a day. Yeah! Call the police, Miss Blenerhassit!
zen_tom, May 09 2005
  

       The poor CIA, they get blamed for everything.
Shz, May 09 2005
  

       No, THEY get blamed for everything.
zen_tom, May 09 2005
  

       I blame THEM.
I bought one of THEM gadgets...
(THEY sold it to me)
When I got it home, it broke!
I had to call THE GUY to come and fix it.
I think THE GUY is the president of THEM and THEY.
ato_de, May 09 2005
  

       you know THEY can read your monitor from a distance. Your neighbors SAY they got satellite TV....
dentworth, May 09 2005
  

       Thanks to this posting, my psychiatrist dosen't want me looking at this site anymore...   

       I'm beginning to think he's one of THEM.
daseva, May 09 2005
  

       That's what THEY want you to think. It goes much deeper than that. Deeper, AND all the way to the top, AND the LIE permeates everything we experience. In fact, what's more, is that YOU are directly involved, at a crucial level in all this. Get that? Yes, YOU are the KEY that those at THE TOP wish to USE, in order to gain access to HIDDEN TRUTHS that contain the SECRET of ultimate POWER.   

       The Da Vinci Code was just another diversion. Look past that and see what THEY want to keep hidden. It's hidden everywhere, right in front of our very noses. They're evil bastards, MOCKING us all the time.
zen_tom, May 10 2005
  

       Nyah nyah nyah nyah nyah!
RayfordSteele, May 10 2005
  

       <points-accusatory-finger> You?! </paf>
zen_tom, May 10 2005
  

       I'm thinking you could play games on it as well.
doctorremulac3, May 10 2005
  

       //those who enjoy "Wacko conspiracy spotting"//   

       Who doesn't? That's what the internet was invented for wasn't it?
zen_tom, May 10 2005
  

       The voices in my head I can deal with. It's the voices in my foot that really disturb me. Because I can't hear what they're saying...
lostdog, May 10 2005
  

       I *so* wanted to create a temp account of 'THEM.' just for this.
RayfordSteele, May 11 2005
  

       That would have been cooooool.
moomintroll, May 11 2005
  

       \\in order to gain access to HIDDEN TRUTHS that contain the SECRET of ultimate POWER\\. Why didn't anybody tell me? I should probably go hide. Everyone turn around and count to 10 so interrogation will get THEM nowhere.
hidden truths, May 11 2005
  

       [lostdog] - is that yours? It made my morning.
Detly, May 12 2005
  

       Turned out to be pretty prescient except for the hat part.
doctorremulac3, Feb 06 2013
  

       The iPhone was introduced 29 June, 2007.   

       Spooky, [drrem3].
UnaBubba, Feb 06 2013
  

       I think the poster should sue Apple. They took his idea to market in just over 2 years.
UnaBubba, Feb 06 2013
  

       Apple insists they started developing in 2004.   

       I'm not sure we can trust them though.
Madai, Feb 07 2013
  

       [-] it'll never fly unless they get the hat thing working.
FlyingToaster, Feb 07 2013
  

       I still think being able to wear it as a hat was the best part of the idea.
doctorremulac3, Feb 07 2013
  

       actually the best part is where we get to see what [zen_tom] looks like without the tinfoil hat.
FlyingToaster, Feb 07 2013
  

       Clever. LOL.
Kansan101, Feb 07 2013
  

       You can see the evidence of them hiding the truth - so many links have succumbed to linkrot.
normzone, Jan 14 2014
  

       Either this used to be about something else, or I am feeling much, much better now!
zen_tom, Jan 22 2018
  

       I'll put it this way: DON'T feel much, much better now.
doctorremulac3, Jan 22 2018
  

       (re: poc's link) Well I'll be darned.
doctorremulac3, Feb 15 2022
  

       I'd like to see Steve Jobs's internet history from the later half of 2005 (although they probably started developing it a year or 2 earlier).
neutrinos_shadow, Feb 15 2022
  

       That's right, he saw my iPhone hat idea and said "Hey, what if I do this, only without the hat part?"   

       Damn you Jobs!
doctorremulac3, Feb 15 2022
  

       Fishbones beat buns by more than 2 to 1. I wasn't even on HB then and I still feel the same way about Iphones.
4and20, Feb 16 2022
  

       Of course you invented the iPhone, [doc]; here at Camp Teacup we have a word for when inventions are stolen from us: copyripped.   

       "If" I were a conspiracy factist, I'd say that we half-Bakers are the half-Braintrust of the modern world, in the same way that all inventions of any worth in the late 1800s came from our compatriot suit-wearing, perfectly coiffed, be-hatted inventors working in solariums, back gardens, and small-hold outbuildings.   

       Interestingly, HB functions as a registry of our intellectual property; we just need to arrange to be quoted as evidence in lawsuits to prove utility and reliability.   

       I myself invented the UN CitizenShip which is already informally in use, and which I predict will shortly be formalized off the coast of Ukraine.
Sgt Teacup, Feb 17 2022
  

       Well I'll tell Apple I'm fully willing to settle out of court for... let's see... a donut. Okay, half a donut but that's my final offer. I'll take this all the way to the Supreme Court!   

       Here's my opening argument:   

       "If I may address the ladies and gentlemen of the court, its esteemed officers, your honors. Imagine if you will, that I, doctorremulac3, invented the iPhone.   

       Thank you. I rest my case."
doctorremulac3, Feb 17 2022
  

       <after much consultation> We are fully convinced by the evidence offered that you, [doctorremulac3] did indeed invent the iPhone. <passing of pieces of paper> And as such we sentence you to <shuffling of papers> twenty years imprisonment with hard labour and no reprieve. That is all. Court dismissed. Take him away.
pocmloc, Feb 17 2022
  

       Idea posted before I was born.
xenzag, Feb 17 2022
  

       Do I at least get donuts jail?
doctorremulac3, Feb 17 2022
  

       Donut pass Go, donut collect $200.
pertinax, Feb 17 2022
  

       //Do I at least get// No. Add 5 years for impertinence.
pocmloc, Feb 18 2022
  

       That's okay. We have incontrovertible evidence of his innocence.
RayfordSteele, Feb 18 2022
  

       //Add 5 years for impertinence.//   

       Righto, I'll add five years for 'im. Wait; you weren't talking to me, were you?
pertinax, Feb 18 2022
  

       People ask if I'm ever wrong about anything and I point this out. Once I thought I was wrong in predicting they'd make hats out of my iPhone idea. Turns out I was wrong, they did become a thing.   

       Nobody's perfect.
doctorremulac3, Aug 21 2024
  

       ha
theircompetitor, Aug 21 2024
  
      
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