h a l f b a k e r y"Bun is such a sad word, is it not?" -- Watt, "Waiting for Godot"
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For the American who wants that high-quality, BBC feel to everything he reads on the web, I propose a simple Anglophile browser plug in that makes simple American/English word substitions. For example, 'program' becomes 'programme', 'behavior' is replaced by 'behaviour', 'while' is changed to 'whilst',
and 'pants' go to 'trousers'. Once this simple dictionary substitution works, more advanced versions can do metric and currency conversions. For the full effect, dates can be re-arranged to 'day Month Year', and times can be switched to GMT.
The test should be that the user can't distinguish between an article from the NY Post and another from The Economist on the same subject. The user should also suspect Matt Drudge to be Canadian.
Wikipedia: Whilst
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Whilst
"Indeed, while (but not whilst) in dialects of Northern England and Scotland usually takes the meaning of until, as in: 'I shall wait while you are ready.'" [calum, Jun 22 2005]
Would this work?
ICML
It's not a plug-in though. [angel, Jun 22 2005]
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I really like the idea of something that could convert english to metric and vice versa automatically.
Of course then there is always the risk of ending up with irritating numbers like 2.452436543262. |
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What's half a bakery in imperial units? |
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My dog trousers whilst practicing his behaviour programme. |
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There was a dramatic autumn in the stock market today. |
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//What's half a bakery in imperial units?// |
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In general, I like the idea. However, I feel that context is crucial. Else, "As Pants the Hart for Cooling Streams" becomes "As Trousers the Hart for Cooling Streams?"
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and:
Elephant's "boot"? (trunk)
Nixon's "draughts" speech? (Checkers)
"Wing" guitars? (Fender)
etc.
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//English is metric.// Oh yes. Bugger.
I forgot. Can we distinguish two types
of English, for use in different
circumstances? |
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We can have "Archer's English" for use
at home and when shopping ("A pound
and half of fathoms, please, Mr.
Shopkeeper, and a couple of yards of
your finest Perch"); and "Technical
English" for use at work and to confuse
Americans and Mars spacecraft ("Set the
quantum altimeter to seven metres,
Edwin, then adjust the colour to twelve
degrees centigrade.") |
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Love it. Would it also get rid of all those fucking zeds (zees to you USians) everywhere? They drive me to distraction. |
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I remember an afternoon back when I was new to the Web, trying to figure out why the webpage I was coding wouldn't display correctly. After a frustrating hour or so: "Ohh... I've spelled 'centre' 'centre' instead of 'center'. Grr! #%$&&!*@ American English!" |
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[squeak] I have a horrible feeling that
many of the Americanisms we hate
(including Z's) are actually hangovers
from old English (as it was in the
1700s). If I remember the gist of Bill
Bryson's book correctly, it's the British
who've changed their English as much
as the Americans. |
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Just don't mention this to any
Americans. The last thing we need is
for them to come over all smug at
having preserved the language. |
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[MaxwellB], we Americans hate hangovers from Olde English as well. Those 40 oz. (1.2L) bottles are killer! |
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I have a sneaking suspicion that th
appenduncular "e" in "Olde" is an
Americanism. On th other and, it may just
b an old English advertising quaintness. |
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In Olde English, the extra e's were just bandied about at will - remembere this is before ye invention of dictionaries or spellinge. The character similar looking to the lettere Y was used to denote the "th" sound, hence "Ye Olde Shoppe" would, rather disappointingly, be pronounced "The Old Shop". |
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Quite. And not to be confused with "ye" as
in "you" (thee, thou, ye and you). |
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Incidentally, this is a topic about which I
know almost nothing worthwhile, so it is
quite possible I am offending true linguists
by talking complete bollocks. I just
thought I should make this clear, in case I
ever decide to talk about something I do
know something about, which is unlikely. |
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//it is quite possible I am offending true linguists by talking complete bollocks.// |
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Can I borrow your disclaimer? |
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Certainly. Use it wisely and broadly. |
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They didn't preserve the old language but changed different things so some old words and phrases remain. Also, over here they call their version of imperial measures 'English' ones, becasue they use the same names (pint, gallon etc.). This sucks really hard as the actual measures are different. My theory is that someone on the mayflower had recently been ripped off over a poorly printed measuring jug. |
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How about one for anglophobes? |
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