h a l f b a k e r yContrary to popular belief
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I just love the French, admire their fashion, food, joie de vivre, language and literature.
Oh and that accent is just so romantic.
One thing lets them down, French kissing is a mess.
Lets introduce them to the gentle and cultured art of air kissing to complete their image.
Quapla!
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But they smell like de toilette. Sorry po, but I have a motto: Ze French must die. Although I do enjoy Cotes de Rhone wine - geographically, the weather cooperates with good vines in the region and therefore is the most consistent in terms of producing not only quantity but quality which keeps an easily affordable and palatable wine available without concern for 'off' years. That being the case, shaved otters could produce the wine just as easily. Back to topic... The French can air kiss my ass. |
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Air kissing? Is that anything like air guitar, perhaps miming the mouth motions of a pre-recorded kiss? |
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how do you 'pose' a french kiss? |
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Shame on you, th'wax. The French are lovely people. I respect anyone stubborn and intransigent enough to force Disney to rename their defining character. |
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Air kissing, though. What's the point in that, then? |
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Whasssuuuppp! (Sorry, it's been awhile.) |
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Speaking of Disney, I saw a special offer in a French hypermarket on the video called Blanche Neigle et les Sept Naems which, for me, translates as White Snow and the Seven Dwarfs. |
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maggie, often (but not always, and I don't know the rule, if there is one) French adjectives follow the noun they modify (that's why Baton Rouge means "red stick"). Assuming that's the case for the video title, Blanche Neigle would in fact translate as Snow(y) White. |
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I got yer Baton Blanche right here Frenchie. Oh come now, I'm being silly, though I suspect there is a reason why the wondrous Dilberts Desktop Game of Elbonian Airlines allows one to zing junior management types at balloons and France. One of the greatest games ever invented. |
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kissing good.
air kissing bad.
arse kissing common.
The idea that there's anything special about french kissing is a myth. I have done more research on that than in two years of a geophysics PhD. I really don't think the French are more culturally or sexually avant-garde than any of the rest of us. In fact, I read somewhere that sociologically the French are resting on their laurels somewhat, living off this waning image of romanticism and excitement. So yes to [po]'s sentiment, the French do need some remedial training, but leave out the air kissing part. Let's not beat about the bush here. So to speak. |
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<chauvinistic francophobia> France...lovely country, good food, great culture...utterly wasted on the French. </chauvinistic francophobia> |
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I think you'll find that French kissing has no real connection with the French. |
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These things can get easily confused as shown by the French and English euphemistic terms for the condom. The English call the "French letters" and the French call them "capon anglais". There is also the curious case of American "French fries" which are remarkably dissimilar to French "pomme frites". |
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I've always been interested in the fact that one does not find Vienna sausages in Vienna, french fries in France (pommes frites are admittedly similar, but not exactly), frankfurters in Frankfurt, and until relatively recently, hamburgers in Hamburg. And I'm not as sure, but I don't recall seeing Danish pastries in Denmark. |
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Well, I can think only think of the French band called Air... How about Turkish Coffee? Don't you think they have that down there in Turkey? |
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I am a pedant in more than one language. The proper spelling of that Klingon word is "Q'apla." And connecting that with something as airy-fairy as air kissing (or for that matter, French people) is enough to make a good Klingon barf up his gagh. |
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[beauxeault] (a suspiciously French sounding handle, that) The rule for modifiers that come before the nouns they modify in French is B-A-N-G-S (adjectives concerning beauty, age, number, goodness and size come before). Thus "ma vielle tante," ( my elderly aunt) while "le table vert" (the green table). |
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I just can't figure out why "Beaujolais nouveau" is exempt from this rule, since "new" has to do with age... |
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quapla - klingon francais. |
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Beaujolais nouveau; it's a faux ami, isn't it? One of the exceptions. I alwyas remember having to ask for un cahier neuf s'il vous plait madame, at school. Again, there you find the 'new' adjective after the noun. |
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The French have something called "creme anglais" which is suspiciously like custard ... |
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They also have 'vacance Anglais' which is properly called 'French leave'. |
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You know, I'm sorely tempted to post "French Kissing For the Heir", but I'm sure Wills needs no lessons, and as for the immediate heir - {{{{{uuuuuugh}}}}} - the thought alone makes me nauseous. |
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<joie de vivre>? What French would this be then? French Canadians? |
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Two words in defense of the French: Bearnaise sauce. If you've had it done right, you'll know why they should be permitted to continue to exist. Foie gras, too. |
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Je ne sais pas. I pense que ce idee est tout a fait 'bakeable', mais je pense qu'il mérite l'os d'un poisson (un -) |
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Ha! This is good, but let's just keep it
at kissing. + |
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I tried some Air French Kissing, but it turned out more like a Bronx cheer. |
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I coodnote elp myzelff frrom rreeDing ze idea and all
ze ennotashioux wizz Fransh axcenn. Zorry. |
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Ze problem issi zat now I cannote understen one
worr. |
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I think the real problem here is that the French are highly
unlikely to adopt any custom that is not already
intrinsically French. |
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They invented parctically every custom, [Alterother] so there really is no distinction. |
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I'm reasonably certain the French did not invent, nor is there any credible historical evidence that they have ever engaged in, the custom of bathing. |
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Of course there is. Alterother. Everyone knows that bathing was invented by Général de Brigade Jacques Uzi of the Légion étrangère. Having first invented the sub-machine gun, he subsequently needed a thorough clean up after each blood-soaked rampage through the streets of Algiers. And so the whirlpool bath came into being. |
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I remember the first time I visited Paris as a young
man. As my buddy who was living there drove me
into town, I said "Ahh, Paris, city of lights..." and a
banana hit our windshield. Of course there were low
points to
the trip too. |
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Anyway, how about air French kissing? |
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Isn't that just sticking your tongue out at somebody? |
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Yea, it just hasn't been called "air French kissing"
before. |
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