h a l f b a k e r yPlease listen carefully, as our opinions have changed.
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<aside>Charles Dodgson's father was rector of a church two miles from my home town. He got his pen-name by translating his name into Latin and back into English (without benefit of Babelfish).</aside> |
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"Banned from Aleph"
lyrics by Kevin Wald
to "Banned from Argo" by Leslie Fish |
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As we approached the Aleph Inn and tried to park our car,
They noticed there was one of us for every point in R;
Their room-list had the wrong transfinite cardinality,
Alas -- for it was Aleph Null and our bunch was C. |
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So we're banned from Aleph, almost all,
Banned from Aleph -- their hotel's just a little small.
We may be only aleph-one (or -twelve or -fifty-four)
But Aleph has no room for any more. |
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The desk clerk tried to fit us in, but each prospective list
He gave us, we diagonalized to show him who he'd missed.
He grew a bit irate, for we were starting to be pests ---
We each were chatting up a different subset of his guests.
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He said we could omega-tuple up (this plan assumes
That aleph-zero sleep in each of aleph-zero rooms).
The manager came over, though, and said in somber voice
That such a scheme would violate the Axiom of Choice.
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We phoned another Aleph Inn, it didn't help a bit;
The clerk at Aleph One could prove he couldn't prove we'd fit.
At last, I called the local shul when services were done;
The cantor let us spend the night in Temple Beth-Sub-One. |
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'Cause we're banned from Aleph, almost all,
Banned from Aleph -- their hotel's just a little small.
We may be only aleph-one (or -twelve or -fifty-four)
But Aleph has no room for any more. |
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Escher? "Did you ever get the feeling we're going around in circles. We passed that roller coaster an hour ago and there it is again. It's upside down now. This place is scaring me, let's get out of here." |
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You can try to leave, but the exit just leads you back inside. |
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I was about to post that line from H. Cal. but decided not to. |
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the hall of mirrors was cool |
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the tunnel of love was hot hot hot |
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But the water of love, not so much |
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