h a l f b a k e r yNaturally, seismology provides the answer.
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A set of stickers, to be surreptitiously stuck on random items in the supermarket.
Abestos-free!
https://xkcd.com/641/
[Spacecoyote, May 28 2012]
[link]
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Or even: Free Benzene Now! (with a little graphic of an anthropomorphic version of the chemical peering out from behind a set of prison bars) |
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Particulalrly suitable for coffee, spices, herbs,
indeed anything Aromatic… |
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Exactly - the kind of reaction I'd want is "Ah, that's good, my favourite brand of coffee contains no benzene - wait! are they saying it used to contain benzene?" |
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What happens if you put it on a bottle of benzene? |
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////"Now Benzene free!"
What happens if you put it on a bottle of benzine?
-- not_morrison_rm, May 28 2012//
That would be OK, as Benzene and Benzine are (I think) different substances. |
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ok, ok I can't spell benzeen... |
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This would be great if the stickers used a benzene-
based adhesive. |
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...with an explanation in small font: "Benzene is not good for you..." |
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You'll be found out when old people start calling up to complain about the change. |
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"I love the smell of benzene in the morning
…" |
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"For rectal use only" had a good run a few years back. |
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Sticker needs small print: "Warning - this sticker can only be removed with a solvent containing benzene" |
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Now, with 20% fewer carcinogens! |
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I'm pretty sure marketing is all in the way you say it. You could probably write: "More than twice the benzene of other products!" and people would be impressed. We live in a culture where people take anti-oxidants before they to go the oxygen bar. |
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Benzene! For use in oxygen bars!
Check with your doctor if benzene is right for you. |
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This is all well and good but how will you ensure that the 'random' items are truly random? |
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A Reimann Zeta Function formula could be printed on the
backing. |
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Free from over 99.99999% of chemical compounds. |
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