h a l f b a k e r yReplace "light" with "sausages" and this may work...
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Similar in principle to the "5 items or less" checkout in the supermarket.
This rank would operate alongside the normal one, but each cab would be fitted with a breathalyzer. If all the passengers pass the test, they are allowed to travel in the taxi. If not, they have to use a normal taxi.
Benefits
:
1) Taxi driver reduces the risk of a passenger vomiting in his taxi. Also less risk of violent/abusive passengers.
2) Passengers pay a slightly reduced fare.
Hatfield and the North
http://en.wikipedia...field_and_the_North
I still don't know what Murdoch's on about... [jtp, Nov 16 2006]
Definition of "fewer"
http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/fewer
[jtp, Nov 16 2006]
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Annotation:
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Nice. There could also be an "absolutely shitfaced" service where the cabs would charge premium rates but have entirely flushable interiors. |
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[calum] I'll leave that for the Ninja Pedants to decide. If you're one, then the voting currently stands at 1-1. |
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Can we also have a queue for "I'm buckin' fuckled, but my ole lady's shanctimonioushly teetotal and will kill me an' my dog if I so much as hiccup.", please? |
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<ninja pedant>It's 'fewer' if you're talking about discrete pints, and 'less' is you're talking about the total quantity.</ninja pedant> |
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[angel] Still not clear, sorry. Are you saying that 'less' is correct? |
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I think you're all more or less (not fewer) correct. One might drink fewer than 5 pints, which would result in there being less than 5 pints in one's tummy-tum-tum. |
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Loving your work on "discrete", angel. have you got any Hatfield and the North records? |
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I think that there should be dual-wording signage, to eliminate the issue. |
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Or a few more pints and a kebab to eliminate everything. |
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Kebabs have that effect on me too. |
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Could you get some sort of certified "good drunk" card? I think the only way I'm ralphing (or becoming violent/abusive) on only 5 pints is if the cab is rolled over multiple times. |
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You've never heard of the "four-pint screamer"? |
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I think cabbies already avoid a potential fare who'se carrying a kebab, on the basis that only the "vayy, vayy djunk" will be eating them. |
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Why not just put barf bags in the back of the cab? They do it in planes. |
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if i'm drunk, chances are i won't know the difference - or care for that matter |
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In my town, cabs don't accept anyone who's noticeably drunk (or eating a kebab). |
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The problem with the idea is that those of us who like to drink but haven't yet obtained a "good drunk" card (terrific idea, especially for an excellent drunk like me)is that the taxi drivers wouldn't pick up people like me. |
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"less" is used for things which cannot be separated (I feel less like upchucking now than I did before eating the ke---mmmuuuarrghhhh..."); "fewer" for discrete units ("I will not throw up in your cab as I have drunk fewer than 7 pints") |
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I stand corrected. I don't really like it though, it just doesn't sound right for some reason. |
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Sorry, I did change the title to 'fewer', but now I've changed it back again. I don't care if it's wrong. I'm all for pedantry, but the word 'fewer' in my opinion looks and sounds ugly. It's only one letter away from 'sewer'. Coincidence? |
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BTW Zimmy, please post the "good drunk" card idea. It's a far simpler solution to the problem, and eradicates the need to use the f word. |
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Or, we could all be like Santa, and take the turbocharged riding lawnmower home =^-^= |
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I thought that was George Jones w/ the lawnmower.
([jtp], I think I've got baker's block right now. You're welcome to do up the idea. All the ideas I've been getting have already been either baked, are no good, or are already here.) |
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//['Fewer' is] only one letter away from 'sewer'. Coincidence?// |
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Perhaps... but then again, 'less' is only one letter away from 'cess'. |
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//"5 pints or less" taxi rank
Separates the drunks from the non-drunks//
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I hope this applies to the drivers, too. |
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Yes, that's exactly what it is. And it is perfectly all right, for at least two reasons: First, no-one is born drunk, they simply make themselves drunk and second, the discimination can be objectively justified as it is unfair that those who choose not get themselves steaming drunk sould not have to subsidise those that do. |
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pints a pound the world around |
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drunks should get the discount /\50% |
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H20 @ 32.8 degrees celcius = |
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they nEED to BE inCentivized |
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donate to FREE DRUNK RIDES |
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//I've changed it back again. I don't care if it's wrong// it isn't, unless you have a particular problem with people who drink from pint glasses. As angel said, fewer refers to discrete units so unless you would let someone who had drunk eleven halves into your cab less is the correct word. Of course a super-bitchy pedant would point out that one can get paralytic long before reaching five pints of whisky but would be able to claim false advertising if one were turned away from the taxi due to it's results. |
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//pints a pound the world around// ...for milk eggs and water. |
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