h a l f b a k e r yBaker Street Irregulars
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Have people realised how dangerous it would be to be
either deaf or unable to speak in a Zombie Apocalypse?
A primary cliché of the genre is to demand that someone
speaks in order to prove they are not a zombie. A deaf
person might not be able to hear the question, while a
mute person will
not be able to respond unless the
stressed-out inquisitor is able to recognise the local sign-
language as something other than random zombie
writhing.
I proposed a pack that responds to questions with "I am
not a zombie; just unable to speak. Please do not kill me".
To ensure that this doesn't work on people who have died
and "returned" the pack checks for the correct body
temperature. It could be worn around the throat.
A deluxe version could be created for couples unable to
speak, where one says something like "I am not a zombie
and neither is my spouse/partner/fellow survivor; we are
just unable to speak. Please do not kill us." It would have a
switch to allow the user to swap back to the single
message if their significant other is eaten.
I thought of this while pondering what kind of architecture
would be zombie-proof without being too expensive. This
was probably consist of tactics including ha-has, moats and
elevated living space.
what happened to the Anasazi?
http://www.trussel....prehist/news128.htm
"Generations of scientists have postulated that such suspended villages - located far from water - represented a fear of a great foe. Turner suggests the Anasazi took up these defensive positions against a horrible enemy - the evil that had infiltrated their own people. " [bungston, May 30 2011]
[link]
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Oops, I should have know better to have discussed
the inspiration for the idea after the idea itself. |
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But I'll look into those structures. I guess they were
designed to ward against herds, much as the English
(and French) ha-has were. |
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Given that zombies feed on human brains, it seems like a deaf and mute person would want to be seen, as much as possible, munching on a cheeseburger. Hey, it may not do that much for their cholesterol level, but at least people will know they're not zombies... |
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Bun for being zombie related [+]. |
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Hey [grog], that would have the opposite effect shirley? I mean what do you think burgers are made out of? |
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Like, Human Brain Cheeseburgers? Hadn't thought of that one! |
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Betcha McDonalds have ... |
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a device that indetifies a living thinking human
beeing, not trained by company orders, e.i. a banker
that sticks to the future possibilities, and not refers
to demanding further documentation,.. |
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Hey, [sirau] - speed kills. |
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Manufacturing would be a problem for until the
Zombie Apocalypse strikes you would have no precise
knowledge of the running temperature of a zombie,
in order to perform the alive or undead test. |
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It might be a problem if an owner of said pack were to become a zombie - they would have the paperwork to prove otherwise and suddenly find themselves in a veritable brainsfest. |
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+ Thanks for your dedication and serving as a resource on
these issues. |
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/ Many old Navajo and Pueblo structures would do quite well to protect their occupants from zombies. / |
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I like it. Also the whole concept of historic zombie armageddons. It would be a great starter for a movie - how those Anasazi cliff dwellings really got to be abandoned. I am pretty sure that there is evidence of bones munched by human teeth found in the context of those cliff dwellings, which was interpreted as cannibalism but could also be zombie predation. The movie would show the fall of Anasazi civilization to zombies and the subsequent dissolution of most zombies in the desert. Underground, however... |
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One could show the ancient Navajo hunting down the remaining zombies. Spooky Navajo magic/legends are great movie stuff. The modern Indian zombie fighter from an ancient lineage of zombie fighters. Plus the buff Navajo martial arts master has not really been done since Billy Jack. Magic conchos, anyone? |
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Prehistoric hunter-gathers would have an easier
time with a Zombie Apocalypse, I believe. |
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For a start there would no extreme over
population that might become rapidly converted
into a ravenous hoard. A village of zombies is far
less worrying than a whole city ... |
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Every adult would theoretically be mobile and
know how to gather or hunt food. They probably
would be used to tribal raiding and would probably
carry a workable set of weapons or tools that they
could replace, if necessary. |
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If someone can ward off or kill the local species of
big cat with a flint spear then a zombie should not
be much of a problem, even with the modern
tendency for them to run at you when "aroused". |
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gnomethang - I do mention the checking of the
temperature of the wielder, which should prevent
the pack working for users when they are converted
into shamblers. |
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Beg pardon [Aristotle] - I missed that! |
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Ah, where's a good Zombie Apocalypse when you need one? |
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Although I recognize the problem as legitimate one, the solution is silly. A couple of simple mathematics questions answerable through the showing of the correct number of fingers would do the trick. Hell, throw them a pen and see if they can use it. Or offer the suspected zombies a laptop and ask them to correctly answer a captcha (please allow for two or three attempts, some times those things are less then obvious). [-] |
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