h a l f b a k e r yIt's as much a hovercraft as a pancake is a waffle.
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The worldwide spread of
Mediterranean cuisine means that
everyone has ready access to garlic
now. This, taken with the shortage of
virgins makes life so hard for the
modern werewolf that many are ready
to just give it all up.
So,
this is a service which, on the night of
the full
moon, takes you away to the
airport and straps you into a fast jet.
Then, with refuelling planes ready at
strategic points, you will be flown
around the world, just keeping ahead
of the setting sun and thus cleverly
missing the night of the full moon.
Why put up with the full moon
http://www.halfbake...20The_20Full_20Moon [theircompetitor, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]
Garlic
http://www.herbsandspices.org/garlic.html Protection from werewolves [hippo, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]
Google "werewolves garlic"
http://www.google.c...c&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8 Google returns a mixture of links, some saying garlic works against werewolves, some saying the opposite. I think some empircal tests are needed. [hippo, Oct 04 2004, last modified Jun 11 2007]
Spokesperson?
http://www.6942.net/teenwolf.jpg [Mr Burns, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]
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Annotation:
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I don't know if this is ambitious enough |
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That time of the month again, eh, [hippo]? |
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I can only see one problem: little bad weather or a mechanical fault, a short delay, and you've got a plane full of werewolves. On the other hand, it might just crash and kill them all. |
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unless it's made of silver, how is it going to kill them? |
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the vampire flight crew led by Kate Beckinsale kills them of course, duh. |
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//unless it's made of silver// The werewolf always dies on the silver screen. |
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"Coffee, tea, or blood of the innocents?" |
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If only we hadn't retired Concorde. |
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[kropotkin] - don't worry, there are
crucifix-wielding sky marshalls |
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Okay, can somebody help me out here? The full moon doesn't shine on only one night, right? Moon phases go for several days at a time. |
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//the full moon doesn't shine on only one night ...// If you want to be absolutely anal-retentive it doesn't even shine for a whole night. The moon is only full when moon-earth-sun are in perfect alignment (moon outside orbit of the earth). That only happens for an infinitesimal amount of time, once each month. That may be the reson why werewolfes are so rare. |
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Garlic? Cruficix-wielding? I think we're getting some legends crossed. |
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isn't garlic for vampires or gnomes or something? |
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I can't speak for other lycanthropes out there but I like garlic. |
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You had me worried there, but at
least one source suggests that
garlic is effective against
werewolves. It's on the internet, so
it must be true - see link. |
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What happens when you are grounded by some
equipment delay or bad weather and witness the sunset?
That would be a fun plane for the flight attendants. |
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The extension of this idea, out of the narrow target market of lycanthropes to the slightly larger market of the fabulously wealthy, could result in a company called, say, Crepusculair, that can thanks to careful control of speed and perfectly executed mid-air fuelling, offer the passenger the chance to circumnavigate the globe, taking in those geographical features he or she wishes to see, all the time remaining at the same time. Perpetual eerie twilight, glorious peachy pink sunrises, the shadowless moment of perfect noon, whatever tickles the fancy, right the way across this planet. |
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Yes, this is, as has been pointed out elsewhere, a time machine, though not one for travelling through time, but for remaining fixed in a point in time, travelling through just three dimensions rather than the classic four, hanging forever in a moment of perfect beauty, like an airborne, peanut munching Miss Havisham. Indeed, given the exclusive nature of the service, there is no reason why the passenger cannot wear their wedding dress or, indeed, get married on the flight. Further, scientific uses, as a control for other more ambitious time travel projects, cannot be ruled out. |
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