Waking Ducks

NYC – We met Monsieur Cerveau D'Oiseau at a pond in Central Park where he was hard at work training ducks. D'Oiseau is world renowned for his successful efforts teaching geese new migratory routes. Flying ultra-light aircraft he led young birds in formation on safer routes between Europe and Africa. Using a similar approach but with model boats, the beak-nosed Belgian is attempting to train ducklings to swim in formation.

“I noticed the long wake from mother ducks and realized that just like in the air, birds could swim more efficiently in a V-formation.” The doctor flapped his arms in exuberant gesticulation as he compared the ducks to dolphins easily swimming beside a boat. “It would be a feather in my hat to teach this generation more effective paddling, which they would pass on to their species, resulting in fatter, healthier ducks.” We left our animal friend munching a sardine-seaweed sushi lunch amid the buzzing propellers and happy quacking of his flock that swerved and veered like a cursive V on crack.