h a l f b a k e r yNot so much a thought experiment as a single neuron misfire.
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Office a little quiet lately? Do you pine for the days
when
large printing jobs required earplugs and office
complexes
were industrial-noise hazards?
Well, want NO MORE, poor office drone! Here to take
you
back to 1988 is the FortCo USB Dot-Matrix Printing
Emulator!
Contained
in this classy, modern 9" x 4" x 2" inordinately
thick, beige plastic housing resides a simple, low-
definition speaker and proprietary USB print-translator.
Connected between your computer or network hub and
computers, the adjustable USB appliance will emit the
dulcet tones of a dot-matrix printer as your high-
definition, full color documents make their way through
the bowels of whatever printer you currently run!
Adjustable calibration means that you can vary the
length
of the audible printing drone to coincide with your
printer's
average print speed! The size of the print job is
analyzed
in the integrated print job interpreter and the on-board
speaker and electronics take care of the rest! Pre-
programmed routines also include the classic "sharp,
etching sound of a worn out ink ribbon" and the
occasional
"sound of broken plastic gears becasue Gary from down
the
office dropped a coffee stirrer in the blasted thing ...
again" sound!
Additional sound packs can be downloaded to emulate a
wide array of manufacturers too! Such as XEROX,
Cannon
as well as Oklahoma's leader in technological innovation:
OKIdata!
Inspiration:Dot Matrix Laser Printer
Dot_20Matrix_20Laser_20Printer
[MikeOliver] [Letsbuildafort, Jan 29 2015]
BEHOLD!
https://www.youtube...watch?v=o4JnqNyVLbU
OKIdata Microline90 [Letsbuildafort, Jan 29 2015]
oki memories
http://www.oki.co.n...id=tcm:135-10918-16
They still sell it. I knew I had an eye for quality back then. [mylodon, Jan 31 2015]
IBM 029
http://en.wikipedia...#IBM_029_Card_Punch
Unforgettable [8th of 7, Jan 31 2015]
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Annotation:
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With typewriter option? Click, Clack, Click, Clack, Bell,
Zzzzzzip... |
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Ahh, who can forget the filling-loosening screech of an Epson MX-80
in NLQ mode ? Or the floorbard-pounding thump of an ASR-33
Teletype, hammering along flat out at a stunning 8 cps ? |
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ah... i remember that screech... i had an mx-80 and a ml-320 |
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felt like you were actually getting work done. it's a shame burning CD's never was so visceral. |
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You would have loved the IBM 029 card punch, then. |
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( What did you say? "My other went to the floor" Speak up boy Stop mumbling. ) |
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I wonder what sort of hearing defects the various loud machines/printers caused ? I would bet that loudness, and certain frequencies, and how close the ear was to the printer would be variables on what and how much hearing was lost. |
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Still ear buds and rock music have likely broken more the tiny fibers in the cochlea of human ears than all those printers. |
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What did you say? "My other went to the floor" Speak up boy stop mumbling. |
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