Toilet cybersnake

As perhaps all of us men have already noticed, even though our penis is a wonderful piece of hardware that enables us to piss while standing (amongst other things, of course), it’s not without its flaws. For instance, while it is true that the jet of urine is consistent enough to allow us to aim at a precise target, the rotational speed is perhaps not sufficient to prevent some spray around the target. As a result, even if we start with a perfectly clean toilet, it is more than sure that, after a good relief of the bladder, the toilet will be clean no more. To solve that small inconvenience and as a herald of cleanliness I propose a small apparatus that will keep all sanitary objects as clean as when they were originally bought.

It consists of a hose with a female receptacle. This hose is articulated and the joints are motorized so that it’s able to reach the user’s penis by itself. A video camera and an intelligent docking system are also part of the package. The idea is that the user stands in front of the toilet and takes the male organ out as he generally would when urinating on a toilet. The image processor unit of the docking system recognizes a penis in its field of cybernetic vision and activates the hose that will *gently* dock with the aforementioned male organ. The user will then comfortably and without the inconvenience of holding his trumpet, piss away. The system will monitor for the end of the urinating act and wait some time after the last droplet. After the timeout has been reached, some washing solution with neutral PH will be squirted up the hose. A mild temperature air jet is then used to dry everything up. The hose finally undocks and recoils back to its nest. The toilet is left with its original clean fragrance. Always clean and dry!