h a l f b a k e r yPoint of hors d'oevre
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when guzzling a pint would be a farce
and leave you feeling bloated,
but drinking from a 'ladies glass'
would with contempt be noted,
when you live in a country of mills and inns
where metric's the devil's measure,
but a pint's too much, and a half won't do,
and
half way lies your pleasure,
when you know a half won't quench your thirst
but a whole pint seems like greed,
if drinking in litres seems perverse,
a three-quarter pint's what you need.
(?) A Trading Standards document
www.dundeecity.gov.uk/ehts/03annual.pdf
Check page 7 [angel, Oct 05 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]
Again
http://www.tradings.../pages/consumer.htm
Search for "third" [angel, Oct 05 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]
(?) The Capacity Serving Measures (Intoxicating Liquor) Regulations 1988
http://www.hmso.gov...lighter_first_match
"beer and cider shall be sold by retail only in a quantity of 1/3 pint, œ pint or a multiple of œ pint" [DrBob, Oct 05 2004, last modified Oct 17 2004]
The Capacity Serving Measures... 2010
http://www.nmodoito..._consultversion.pdf
The world looks better at the bottom of a large glass. [whatrock, May 07 2016]
[link]
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Buy a pint, you Pommie git
Drink most of it, and leave a bit. |
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leaving beer is sacrilegious,
if from pom you're indiginous. |
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P.S. (No offence intended; apologies extended) |
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Pubs in UK are permitted (or is it 'obliged'?) to sell beer by the pint, half-pint and third-pint. Try asking for two-thirds of a pint. |
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Wow [angel] that is a truly wonderful fact. I shall be out to investigate this evening. |
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My favourite beer quantity is the noggin - a quarter of a pint. [jonthegeologist] is fond of asking if one 'needs the extra noggin' if it's his round and you're not far into your pint. |
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A bun, for the lines // when you live in a country of mills and inns where metric's the devil's measure// if nothing else. |
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Bun earned for artistic expression alone. |
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Tick. V.Good.
I, too, shall be making enquiries of the bar-keep tonight. If I get beaten up and chucked out into the gutter, angel, I'll know who to blame. |
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My second link suggests that beer and cider are "required" to be sold in units of one third, one half and multiples thereof. |
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One of those rare occasions when the bun's for the anno, not the idea... |
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//Buy a pint, you Pommie git, |
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Drink most of it, and leave a bit.// |
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The poetry in the original deserves a bun too, but I've only got one... sorry... (+) |
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[DrBob] But that happens to you every
night... |
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Maybe the best options would be: One half and one third (83.3%) for real ales, guinness, and anything which requires plenty of head. Meanwhile two thirds (66.6%) for cider and - gulp - lager. I still think I'd prefer to campaign for a magical 75% measure though. |
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Not true hippo. Some nights I don't go to the pub at all. |
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once again I bow down to both your literary and puberary genius. bunderful |
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//One half and one third (83.3%) for real ales, guinness, and anything which requires plenty of head// |
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don't EU regulations say that the head shouldn't be included in the measure, or was I drunk when I heard / made that up? |
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Legislation found. Link added. "beer and cider shall be sold by retail only in a quantity of 1/3 pint, œ pint or a multiple of œ pint" so you can order a third of a pint if it's available but it's not compulsory to sell thirds of a pint so I doubt that you'd have much luck. Two thirds and three-quarters of a pint are illegal - unless you are fortunate enough to frequent a pub which will serve you a 'Sussex half'. |
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whats a 'Sussex Half' Bob? |
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It varies, etherman, depending upon how friendly you are with the bar staff. It's a bit more than a standard half pint and a bit less than a standard pint. |
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ah right, well in Ireland we have a different problem, trying to order a half pint and being persuaded/goaded into buying a full one. Think Mrs. Doyle in Father Ted, |
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'ah go on, ya will, ya will, ya will... (repeat forever).' |
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That time when you're very drunk
But you ain't yet had enough of the gunk,
You want more than a half,
A pint would make you barf
Three-quarts would be a slam-dunk!!! |
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I know its not the same but what about a 330ml bottle? |
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Beer is not metric; it comes in proper Imperial measures, the more archaic the better. |
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//I know its not the same but what about a 330ml bottle?// |
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No. You seem to have confused beer with poncey continental lager. Beer and millilitres do not good bedfellows make. |
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there are some proper beers / ales in bottles not just poncey ones. Guinness in fact, warm off the shelf is bliss. and what ever the measurement its a good half way house. i'd be all for 3/4 pint bottles too. |
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I knew a Scandinavian girl, once. She had a face like
a Norse. |
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Whether filled with guns and bombs
or flowered words or noisy gongs
ideas writ in funny songs
will always make me smile
But wait, there's more in this vanguard
of thought: the beer! if not by yard
So here's to you, [fishrat], our bard:
you went the extra mile.
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