Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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The Salad Compactor

All the salad, none of the hassle.
  (+6, -3)
(+6, -3)
  [vote for,
against]

Salad is by far the most impractical dish imaginable. Strip any known meal of all the ceremony, and you get something fairly manageable. Only salad, no matter how simplified, requires a bowl, fork, in some instances a spoon as well, and time, concentration and coordination.

Not to mention that the typical salad is very elusive. Poke and prod a salad in a bowl for ages, end up with a fork laden with chunks, leaves and tendrils of salad ingredients that are quite difficult to stuff into an average sized mouth without having a stray leaf of baby spinach slap you on the chin and drip dressing in your lap, and when you do manage to maneuver it inside, it turns out to be barely enough salad to produce a satisfying crunch under your teeth.

In both aspects, ergonomics and crunch per cubic inch, the salad falls sadly behind a humble celery stick.

I propose a salad compactor. Simply put in all the salad ingredients, and press the "compact" button. The compactor first mixes all the ingredients, then compresses them (lightly, as not to crush them) to a crunchy, healthy, yet delicious salad bar. The bar would be held together with a bonding agent, corn starch perhaps, or bound together with nori seaweed.

And there you have it: salad sticks. All the salad, none of the hassle. Just pick up and crunch. This could also make salad more attractive to children, as a snack ("fingerfood"), instead of an entire long, boring, table-bound meal requiring one's full attention.

Veho, Nov 15 2007

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       I already have something similar, apart from the fact that I use two slices of bread and a slice of meat meat instead of cornstarch or nori seaweed. It is of course the humble meat and salad sandwich, typified by the BLT but also irresistible in chicken salad or gammon and pickle salad sandwich varieties.
vincevincevince, Nov 15 2007
  

       I knew I should have put some kind of sandwich disclaimer in there. Although I tend to eat all my meals in sandwich form (spaghetti included), I think making a whole sandwich just to eat a light salad would be slight overkill.
Veho, Nov 15 2007
  

       + i have these same issues with salad. finally came up with an excuse that *sorta* works on the wife unit: i just tell her, why eat salad when a multivitamin and some metamucil is probably more effective from a nutrition/fibre standpoint. either that, or just put the salad in a blender then quickly drink it down.
TIB, Nov 15 2007
  

       Baked, the solution is the pita wrap. We used to make Chicken Ceasar salad and now I break out the pitas and a bamboo sushi wrapper and presto a salad cigar/burrito. Add saran wrap or tin foil to hold tight. Tough I am intrigued by the seaweed wrap idea as those seal against themselves and add more flavor than the pita.
MisterQED, Nov 15 2007
  

       Veho, you obviously hate salad - don't eat it.   

       chips are vegetables, eat them!
po, Nov 15 2007
  

       //Veho, you obviously hate salad - don't eat it.//   

       What made you think that? I like salad. My favourite is lettuce (or baby spinach), peppers, tomatoes and carrots, in balsamic vinegar. I'd just like the option of having that in a form of a crunchy stick (much like a carrot, but containing all the other ingredients as well), for when I don't have the time or the patience to sit down with a bowl of it and eat it in a civilized fashion.
Veho, Nov 16 2007
  

       Finally, a clean way to eat salad! Put a bun in your favorite salad! [+]   

       If I could, i'd give another bun, just for "Crunch per cubic Inch".
wolstech, Nov 16 2007
  

       I like it - it has my plus. Only thing, the compactor must take care not to over-squeeze and lose too much of that refreshing lettuce leaf juice.
globaltourniquet, Nov 16 2007
  

       I personally have taken salad fixin's and wrapped them in a large leaf of Romaine, similar to the Pita wrap idea without the bread. Compact without the compactor..
jdlaugh, Nov 17 2007
  
      
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