h a l f b a k e r yCompound disinterest.
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Instead of the usual, boring way of shopping for clothing which includes wandering around in a store and occasionally picking your nose, I propose a new method.
The Jean Pool, a not-so-cleverly named store (I'm hoping they don't exist), contains a full sized swimming pool filled with pants (I'm
American, pants are trousers to me). Rather than a "deep" or "shallow" end, they have pant (trouser) sizes listed numerically from one end to another. You enter the store in a swimsuit (in a warm-weather climate, it can be outdoors), jump in, and find some stuff you like. Try it on right there, it's okay! Just leave your swim trunks on, otherwise the lifeguard will have to take some disciplinary action, or possibly even kill you.
There could even be separate pools for shirts and stuff, and if this turns out to be some huge social event you could even make Gay & Lesbian ones, or single/not single ones.
(?) Floor to floor in the Reservoir Mall
http://collections....ay/rg_eng_i/hyd.htm Perhaps not quite as large as these [mighty_cheese, Nov 26 2001, last modified Oct 04 2004]
The Jean Pool
http://www.thejeanpool.com/jpmods.html Well, it's decidely not a clothing store . . . . [bristolz, Nov 26 2001, last modified Oct 04 2004]
And Jean Pool is trademarked for attire (US)
http://tess.uspto.g...oc&state=p376i8.2.4 TM registered on 6 Mar 01 [bristolz, Nov 26 2001, last modified Oct 04 2004]
[link]
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I understand the arranging by waist size along the length of the pool, but would the long leg sizes be deeper down than the shorter? And what about different styles/colours/finishes? And what's in the diving pool? And are you sure winners don't use drugs? |
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Although I disagree entirely that shopping is AT ALL boring, ever... I like this. Its scope is perhaps limited, since there are many types of clothes which shouldn't be washed in water, or in fact allowed to get wet at all. I wouldn't enjoy the smell of a Woollen Overcoat Pool shop, for instance. And you would be unsure of the effectiveness of your waterproofs if you bought them when they were wet inside and out. Aside from that, you damage stitching by putting clothes in chlorinated water, which decreases the 'life' of the garment. And some crazy (or perhaps just brainless) shop owners might put all their 'dry clean only' clothes in an enormous chemical pool. The safety implications of that make me shudder.
In fact, how do you solve the problem of getting your purchases home? If wet, they are difficult to carry because they are so heavy. And the opportunity to wear your new clothes out of the shop is cruelly taken away. |
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[lg] I think that Afro was suggesting that the pool would be filled with jeans and NOT filled with water. |
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However, heading for the showers once you've picked out your jeans would allow you to shrink 'em to fit a la 80's Levi's tv advert. |
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This could lead to an alternative use for reservoirs - zoom around in rented speedboat, visiting little rafts with designer clothes on them. |
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oooh, I like that even more. Perhaps gondolas or rowing boats with hunky man transporting us girls around? |
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Are you going to post "Reservoir Mall" or shall I? |
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Can I fishbone Reservoir Mall? It'd only be full of sulky skate-punk teenagers on jetskis coming up and splashing you. |
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will Reservoir Mall be on multiple floors? how do you get between them - down on water slides? up on bucket lifts? is conservation of energy maintained? I'd like a Canal Centre more, I think. Endless fun going through the locks, and hopping out onto the towpath to go in the shops. |
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The Reservoir Mall would be full of (Reservoir) Mall (Water) Rats. |
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Lewisgirl: There actually was an 'as you wear them' dry cleaning service back in the era of Meat and Hats. I remember having seen it in action...a line of men and women, walking down a set of stairs into a pool, through the pool and back out, then being blown dry. I can't find a link, though... |
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Actually, as hippo said, I didn't intend for the pool to have any water in it, just jeans (or whatever else) but that might not be a bad idea. |
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