Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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The Jean Pool

Winners don't use drugs
 
(+4, -4)
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Instead of the usual, boring way of shopping for clothing which includes wandering around in a store and occasionally picking your nose, I propose a new method.

The Jean Pool, a not-so-cleverly named store (I'm hoping they don't exist), contains a full sized swimming pool filled with pants (I'm American, pants are trousers to me). Rather than a "deep" or "shallow" end, they have pant (trouser) sizes listed numerically from one end to another.
You enter the store in a swimsuit (in a warm-weather climate, it can be outdoors), jump in, and find some stuff you like. Try it on right there, it's okay! Just leave your swim trunks on, otherwise the lifeguard will have to take some disciplinary action, or possibly even kill you.
There could even be separate pools for shirts and stuff, and if this turns out to be some huge social event you could even make Gay & Lesbian ones, or single/not single ones.
AfroAssault, Nov 25 2001

(?) Floor to floor in the Reservoir Mall http://collections....ay/rg_eng_i/hyd.htm
Perhaps not quite as large as these [mighty_cheese, Nov 26 2001, last modified Oct 04 2004]

The Jean Pool http://www.thejeanpool.com/jpmods.html
Well, it's decidely not a clothing store . . . . [bristolz, Nov 26 2001, last modified Oct 04 2004]

And Jean Pool is trademarked for attire (US) http://tess.uspto.g...oc&state=p376i8.2.4
TM registered on 6 Mar 01 [bristolz, Nov 26 2001, last modified Oct 04 2004]


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Annotation:







       I understand the arranging by waist size along the length of the pool, but would the long leg sizes be deeper down than the shorter? And what about different styles/colours/finishes? And what's in the diving pool? And are you sure winners don't use drugs?
pottedstu, Nov 26 2001
  

       Although I disagree entirely that shopping is AT ALL boring, ever... I like this. Its scope is perhaps limited, since there are many types of clothes which shouldn't be washed in water, or in fact allowed to get wet at all. I wouldn't enjoy the smell of a Woollen Overcoat Pool shop, for instance. And you would be unsure of the effectiveness of your waterproofs if you bought them when they were wet inside and out. Aside from that, you damage stitching by putting clothes in chlorinated water, which decreases the 'life' of the garment. And some crazy (or perhaps just brainless) shop owners might put all their 'dry clean only' clothes in an enormous chemical pool. The safety implications of that make me shudder.

In fact, how do you solve the problem of getting your purchases home? If wet, they are difficult to carry because they are so heavy. And the opportunity to wear your new clothes out of the shop is cruelly taken away.
lewisgirl, Nov 26 2001
  

       [lg] I think that Afro was suggesting that the pool would be filled with jeans and NOT filled with water.
hippo, Nov 26 2001
  

       However, heading for the showers once you've picked out your jeans would allow you to shrink 'em to fit a la 80's Levi's tv advert.
Guy Fox, Nov 26 2001
  

       This could lead to an alternative use for reservoirs - zoom around in rented speedboat, visiting little rafts with designer clothes on them.
hippo, Nov 26 2001
  

       oooh, I like that even more. Perhaps gondolas or rowing boats with hunky man transporting us girls around?
lewisgirl, Nov 26 2001
  

       Are you going to post "Reservoir Mall" or shall I?
hippo, Nov 26 2001
  

       Can I fishbone Reservoir Mall? It'd only be full of sulky skate-punk teenagers on jetskis coming up and splashing you.
pottedstu, Nov 26 2001
  

       will Reservoir Mall be on multiple floors? how do you get between them - down on water slides? up on bucket lifts? is conservation of energy maintained? I'd like a Canal Centre more, I think. Endless fun going through the locks, and hopping out onto the towpath to go in the shops.
lewisgirl, Nov 26 2001
  

       The Reservoir Mall would be full of (Reservoir) Mall (Water) Rats.
hippo, Nov 26 2001
  

       Lewisgirl: There actually was an 'as you wear them' dry cleaning service back in the era of Meat and Hats. I remember having seen it in action...a line of men and women, walking down a set of stairs into a pool, through the pool and back out, then being blown dry. I can't find a link, though...
StarChaser, Nov 26 2001
  

       Actually, as hippo said, I didn't intend for the pool to have any water in it, just jeans (or whatever else) but that might not be a bad idea.
AfroAssault, Nov 27 2001
  


 

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