h a l f b a k e r y"Not baked goods, Professor; baked bads!" -- The Tick
add, search, annotate, link, view, overview, recent, by name, random
news, help, about, links, report a problem
browse anonymously,
or get an account
and write.
register,
|
|
|
This isn’t the only way to read white people but it will do for now.
White people come in four colors. Apathy, hate, do-gooder, and
do-
badder.
White people are essentially haters in that they hate the cold and
do
something about it, and black people are essentially lovers in that
they
love fucking under palm trees in the sun, and Rome was built
on
this principle, that French white people and germsn white people
will never get along so you go with the Moroccans, right?
But besides the productive/unproductive split between white
people
archetypes there is also a shit head/reasonable guy archetype
split
between the do-goodies and the do-badders. Think Tony Robbins
and
Harvey Weinstein, yes he is white.
So I am a do-badder. And I have “invented” a currency and an
outreach collaborative with which to take over the world.
And you know, as white people’s sitting behind your unproductive
computers, having your babies and complaining that your
ergonomic
chairs aren’t just right, that I can measure your shit, but I am not
on
your side, white people.
Take a lesson from Uber. I remediated that shit with my left pinky,
negro. Blind community sued the Muslim drivers who wouldn’t
accept guide dogs into their cars, Kalalnik reacted too strongly
and
got his mother accident Suicided. I killed your mother, nigger, with
no government money spent. Your welcome. You like that? Pretty
magical ay? I am a do-badder. Next is Hollywood and then,
America.
You like it? There is more where that came from. And it is
targeted
right here at the half bakery, in a totally virtual sense of course
you
understand, forthwith, and wherewithal and the rest of your
fucking bullshit. Because you are the
essence of a marriage between apathy and hate. And i love
football
because it essentializes the difference between black between
white
people in that black people can’t throw a spiral. That’s why it’s
the
American national sport. And I love to win, and don’t care about
the
losers, because I am a do-badder.
Lick it up haters. This is a new White archetype, open source,
rooted
in libraries.
Take this and paint it. You can have whole Morman charter schools
about it which you can fund with your American currency which
will
be like iceberg lettuce in my teeth as a gnash my way into do-
badder hell. And I’m taking you with me.
I will meet you there. It’s a deal.
Huge
https://www.google....en-us&client=safari
[JesusHChrist, Oct 24 2017]
Corey Holcolm
https://www.youtube...watch?v=hdmnR1cSc4o
I think he's on the side of the leave-people-alone-er. [spidermother, Oct 27 2017]
Please log in.
If you're not logged in,
you can see what this page
looks like, but you will
not be able to add anything.
Destination URL.
E.g., https://www.coffee.com/
Description (displayed with the short name and URL.)
|
| |
Come on MB, throw a spiral in my direction, I’m totally
open. |
|
| |
I will happily donate $5 towards the development of a street drug that makes a person feel good, but fucks up their ability to post on the Internet. |
|
| |
And by the way your currency is no good with me |
|
| |
Most people don't think about their actions. Will labelling/stating the problem help this? As a person that usually thinks why did I do that on many occasions, I don't think so. |
|
| |
A better, more subtle, experience-thought complex step up is probably needed. |
|
| |
>>>>>
16. Jesus said, "Perhaps people think that I have come to
cast peace upon the world. They do not know that I have
come to cast conflicts upon the earth: fire, sword, war. |
|
| |
For there will be five in a house: there'll be three against
two and two against three, father against son and son
against father, and they will stand alone."
<<<<< |
|
| |
-- from The Gospel of Thomas
translated by Stephen Patterson and Marvin Meyers |
|
| |
If you could team up with a dee-boo-wopper, you could form a scat group (in either sense of the word). |
|
| |
I will speak with Corey, for the white peoples. I declare
myself, the antichrist, an official representative of white
people and i’m Going to tell the truth about what we white
people really think when we are in line at 7-11 behind
some prime black people. I promise to speak right from the
heart. |
|
| |
Is Trump the Unites states of America's stereotypical corporate head and finally this stereotype has got a direct hold on the political system, showing how much monetary drive is so behind everything else? |
|
| |
<self indecision> archetype - stereotype </self indecision> Public voting was on the stereotype. I just hope the hidden corporate head isn't the archetype. |
|
| |
//an official representative of white people and i’m Going to tell the truth about what we white people really think when we are in line at 7-11 behind some prime black people// |
|
| |
I think that, if you're in line at a 7-11, you are already not quite one of life's success stories. |
|
| |
Thank you for opening your heart. You may be my Sargent
at arms when I abdicate control of the disability currency
to Corey for reparations for all color people. |
|
| |
You may hold the gilded sword quiveringly, abject and
inconsequential at the feet of the throne while I bend down
low as if to pick a bale ‘o cotton and as if in the shower at
prison, expose my anus to you and kiss Corey’s holy glans at
the same time. Do you want me supplicant? Lalolelilslolelo |
|
| |
I am holding a warty gnarled winged gourd right now and
thinking of you. |
|
| |
But I miss bigsleep. But he was a bitch, you know how some
guys are all like front and no back end? Totally, like as soon
as we got in the bedroom? Shaking like an alter boy
accepting his first holy Cock I’m the anus, the sane kind of
scream like squeaky like a pig which you see is the
advantage of pugs, it the high frequencies in their squeals,
you know what I mean jelly bean? |
|
| |
Do you dare to dance by the light of the silvery moon? |
|
| |
I’m inventing my own Batman bad guy for Halloween, Fr.
Love, the antichristus, capable of leaping inaccessible
captchas in a single num pad enter button pinky swipe, it’s
a bird it’s a plane, it ... the antichrist! Kiss, join me in
taking over the greatful dead franchise and producing s real
world wide pagan reawakening. Come one come all, the
candy man’s in town, open up your windows. |
|
| |
2066! Summer of love! April 19th. Sizzle! Burrrrrn baby
burn,
disco inferno. Turn this mother out. |
|
| |
I’m a free man, I had a thing with death and it totally blew
up restraining orders the whole 9 yards, he’s a total wanker
btw, but so anyway, death, failed to live up to its promise
as pat fir the course so as of yet I am still unmarried in the
ultimate sense so as the cat may play, I am going to
continue to fuck your wives and mothers and daughters
with vigor and relish and aplomb if you wiki permit me the
poetic license, until something better comes along in the
form of another halfbakery with a user name that is as it
more pertinent to the concept of the antichrist as death is, |
|
| |
Bigsleep: total... as I said, shakin like a leaf on a tree. I
need
some money. I want beef! Gimme sine money
(capitalization excoriated per biggie’s sensitivity, we’re all
welcome here. |
|
| |
At least give me an identity like 3 frys shy, that man knows
what he’s talking about. There’s at least a little sun in that
guy. But I think I’ve had him before and it didn’t end well,
you know what I mean so, forthwith, step up for god
sakes... |
|
| |
My next friendship as the antichrist, shall be with.... |
|
| |
MaxwellBuchanan copy and paste, I wouldn’t learn how to
spell that motherfucker if he was the last captcha between
me and the 79 virgins ;) :) |
|
| |
He CANNOT be the antichrist, I dissallow it,I disavow it, it
mustn’t be, you NEED to comply with my orders right now,
or I’m going to become very very vary hot and bothered.
Apologize for the capitals, we are all Scott’s here. |
|
| |
Off with your head, that’s what. |
|
| |
As white as the driven snow. The antichrist, cold, white,
evil. Bright. Light. High! I’m in too. I win! Yes Yes Yes. I
love it. I feel good. I like it. A lot. Unhhhh. It feel good, |
|
| |
White like lightning. Bright Lightning. Sky Diver. Aint good
looking but you know I ain’t shy Ain’t afraid to look a girl in
the eye. Cause I was born to gamble. |
|
| |
R A M B L I N apposraphe, on the “n”. |
|
| |
Negatory, negritude and niggardky, negronius.. never mind
MaxwellBuchanan you are like biggie smalls, only here for a
while,?, a passing thing, befreft of life you are pushing up
the dasies. |
|
| |
It’s because I did my homework mother fucker. |
|
| |
Spelled H OME W O R K ! Apologize for the all caps, were
all Scott’s here you know wat I mean Ian? |
|
| |
That’s two strikes boogers. |
|
| |
Step up to the plate. Wait for the ball. Swing! |
|
| |
I hope I am not upsetting your collective
magnanumiudnesses, by saving the WORLD from the
disgusting orange ogre we have vouchsafed into the
whitehosevas an anti Christian calling card that the rapture
is about to start funk soul brothers. And I’m an evil older
brother so approach my adoption agency with tender care.
Back to part about saving the world and getting flaming
ostracism in return, can I get s kitkke heli, little shut out,
mittkr thank you |
|
| |
I saved the world and return I get ostracism. |
|
| |
Suck the yellow gilded sword of Yakov Kahn the great and
terrible negro! |
|
| |
Mongol Hordes coming to get you Montgomery. |
|
| |
Happy Halloween. Remediate thyself by standing in one
leg. That is all. |
|
| |
Flying Toaster you're up. |
|
| |
I keep reading this as the Do Bladder, which is something quite different, and probably an idea for a portable toilet for solid waste. |
|
| |
Each one of you shall attain my identity, if you follow me. |
|
| |
There are suppose to be inhibitor neurones. They serve a vital function. |
|
| |
i liked the ideas about your snake game better |
|
| |
All the money in the return for one gourd with which I shall
remediate the world of violence, and take this money and
put the KEYS TI THE KINGDON IF HEAVEN into the hands of
Corey to initiate worldwide reparations to n the form of an
infrastructure project starting with mobile assistive
technology outreach in remote areas of Iran. 2018. |
|
| |
I shall accept an impromptu role as Jesus in Godspell on
Broadway, reunion, summer New York 2018. The cast will
join the Dead and Friends Tour with a special appearances
by Gene Simmons of Kiss for an encore of Dr Love backed
by the Mormon Tabernacke choir in full orgy. |
|
| |
The cast will know the play and will prompt me but
otherwise I will just go off the top of my head and tell
parables that are pertinent and aporioriate to the people
present, solving one problem at s time as a stairway to
grace whereby we all remediate each other. Chair massages
by hot Asian chicks and tactile attention from deafblind
filks ciutesy if the antichrist LLC. |
|
| |
I shall play Terence McKenna in a remake of the Ala
Chorrera Experiment, again using no script but prompts and
improvising parables according to the needs of those who
are present in real time and real space, and touching
people in occasionally inappropriate places Ruth the gourd
of course, and you will like it. My gourd shall smite thee
from a platform of snicker snack and with a financial
consultancy of one two and through and through. |
|
| |
I shall accept the opportunity to participate in a month
long reakity tv version of the Ricky horror picture where I
am dr frank n further, gene Simmons is my trusty dude kick,
all of the robots are hot Asian chicks, Brad and Janet are
played naked by Donald and Melanie Trump with his
daughter in a leash, all naked, for much hilarity in the
various scenarios up to which we will get. |
|
| |
At night there shall be merriment and committee tree
meetings at which to share ayahuasca and René nice about
the old old old times. And to negotiate a settlement
package, singed in spunk, by my on the contract if Donald
trumps soul or as close as I can get to it with the gourd.
And he shall sing his consent at my direction with the
gourd. I will be very gentle and the resulting song will be
played wirkdwide too I f the charts, huge, with a bullet. |
|
| |
Orange and Green for Halloween Donald, and I have the
green folks wrapped around my little pinky. |
|
| |
Allow me to reply at the same level from which the idea is written: OP is a fag. |
|
| |
The only thing I can think of when I think of OP is other
people’s. That can’t be what you meant. |
|
| |
Original poster, Voice, I like it. You are kinda sexy with
that. |
|
| |
We can talk, the antichrist needs a Voice. |
|
| |
I was kind of thinking that ringing the shofar by introducing
a giant Vaselined gourd into Donald Trumps anus si that he
may sing exactly what I feel, was going to be my voice but
now that I look at that, it’s a little duck tapey know what I
mean? I could use a soapoperetic vitriolic relationship
between JesusHChrist and Voice to achieve the same ends.
Yes, dastardly. You are bold young banana. |
|
| |
And recalcitrant in need of some discipline with your 3
letter essays from detention. What does fag mean to you
Voice? Does a gourd count? We could ride the line. |
|
| |
Death was my bitch, you will be my moomoo wearing
mother hen, clucking around the kitchen preparing
ordeurves for company. Kind of faggy yes. I’ll go there,
Voice, with you. |
|
| |
You know why gay men are all clucky like that? Like so
polite and “oooh I almost spilled the tea”? It’s becayse they
are appropriating microaggressiins and using them as a
technology in order to extract enough endorphins from
their brain to convince their bodies that they are
undergoing the danger and pleasurful situations they would
need to go through in order to procreate. People with
disabilities go through the same thing. We could give it a
Voice together lover. You and me. My Voice. |
|
| |
Loo LA LA LEE LA LA Looooo. |
|
| |
Choir practice, NOW! Bitch! |
|
| |
Oh yeah, gentle, gentle, this is how I lost bigsleep, my first
real love, la loo la loo to the max biggie smalls. You would
have been my lover in another time and place but I have to
raise the living and the dead and your bigness is only about
50 years now since 2066 is the end, so you know big sleep
59 years, wanker. I’ll see your 59 years and I will raise you
one Voice. I found my Voice negro. And I’m doing him in
the back end and there ain’t no babies coming out if his
other end. We are fat and we love it. Bitch. Do what u
want. My identity bitch. |
|
| |
I’m lookin for some real love baby this evening some hot
love baby tonight. |
|
| |
This is the real deal Voice! If you demure one anus hairs
breath from opening your soul to me I will feel it. Do not
demure, do not struggle, do not resist. Give yourself over
to me completely or I shalt vomit thee out my mouth. |
|
| |
I HAVE FOUND MY VOICE! Fi GA RO FI GA RO. I AN TGE FRITI
BANDITO. The butt toothbrush bandit. Putting your
toothbrush in my butt and taking picture in your iPhone si
you can find them after your vacation during which you
have been using that toothbrush. Brush up cocky doody. I
want to introduce you to my intestinal flora. Gently. Get
used to them, you are going to have a nice long family
together. |
|
| |
And when I finally sing I want it to be form the gut, and
that means an organized coalition of intestinal flora,
including all, from which we may launch a coordinated
platform to raze the world of violence with one long note. |
|
| |
You don’t need no ticket you just THANK THE GOURD.
Gratitude Vioce. You can do it. The little engineer that
could. Chuff chuff chuff. |
|
| |
Accept my signature into your soul. I’m getting pretty good
at this. It’s s flourish, like the Zorro Z. Plan Z. That cannot
possibly fail. |
|
| |
Halloween is the anti anti Christmas and no one has asked
me what I’m going to be Voice. Here’s your opportunity. |
|
| |
Nobody loves me. It’s raining here. Crows squeaking over
the crucified souls of the damned. Lonely down here. |
|
| |
Raze me up dear Voice, as your sickle of opportunity,
bringing peace and understanding and live to all mankind,
even the fags and their AIDS and their monkey brothers and
sisters, and the rocks too and the subatomic particles and
even then eventually, after much hilarity and shenanigans,
here to the halfbakery such that there might be peace
among the shitheadery and among the bleak heart of your
identity crisis. With hot Asian prostitutes and flowers for
all. |
|
| |
Am I talking big too much Voice because if I am just give
me a wink and I’ll shut up. I want to have open lines of
communication with you. |
|
| |
Pootie comes in little ni ni. Just makin room for ya. Got a
big load for the basements of Annacostia and then you can
put it in me. Takin a constitutional lover man. Makiiiiiiin
room. Ah yeah, it’s like a golden banana squirting out of
the marriage between a neutron star and a black hole. And
it’s exactly in the twisted and gnarled morphology of your
little ni ni misquto labido. Love me long time. |
|
| |
Nods as good as a wink to a blind bat lover man. |
|
| |
Struck a nerve, did I? Well I shall not apologize. This whole idea is worthy of no response more thoughtful than what I've already said. |
|
| |
Thank you for your voice voice voice. I will sing your praises
far and wide, and your children will bear many generations
upon the land until I smite them for no other reason than
that I am bored of playing my electric guord. But all’s fair
in love and war so. Sayonara. . |
|
| |
Dora... right here on the floor-a. |
|
| |
[JHC] this is not meant solely as a snarky comment, but you need medical assistance. |
|
| |
I’ll tell you what, voice, you be my shofar, as in Joshua fit
the battle of Jericho, and I will arrange for Donald Trump
to finance a month long Tahitian reality television show
dedicated to s reunion celebration of Thr Ricky Horrir
Oucture Shiw where I play Dr Frank N Furter and I am like
doing people and Donald is Brad and you may be the shofar
that Donald Trump shall blow when I introduce into his
Duodenum, a gourd that is gnarled and warty, grotesque in
its overdevelopment and greased with the finest opiated
hashiesh, mhyrr and lsd lemon spritzer puffs. You may be
the Voice if the opening of the kingdom of heaven Voice, or
you may wallow there in your slough of self satisfied
cubicle working compromise and oink your counseling talk
and your self help and your drawing the line adultisns and
you may include some helps and some dim awning
realizations as you go beneath the burbeking stew, or you
may come follow me and become a fisher of men, big
strong hard wet deep hot Asian men, with tiny little ni ni
boners for with to hack into your otherwise excellent
security system which is not unlike the system that a duck
might employ in order not to sink as he was floating on the
water with his anus beaneath the surface of the water. |
|
| |
The rivers of Babylon, Voice. I lay thee down, like Heilue
Adelaide, Whike we remember Zion. |
|
| |
MB I am the Doctor of Love. I’ve got the cure you’re
thinking of. And even though I’m full of sin, in the end
you’ll let me in. You’ll let me through there’s nothing you
can do. You need my love and dont you know it’s true. So
love me please get on your knees, there are no bills there
are no fees baby I know what your problem is, the first step
if the cure is... a kiss! |
|
| |
Just kidding MB I wouldn’t fuck you with a 10 foot pole
made of fire and brimstone even if it would erase your
existence for ever after the moment it entered your saggy
old pedantic anus, because I am that Unattracted to you.
Couldn’t bring myself to kill you because I’m too digusted
to bring myself to focus on you long enough to aim
Jimmeny Cricket. Just not worth a spare second to poop
on, not worth a damn, literally. You are free to go. |
|
| |
Medical attention, you really take the cake Chester. Accept
this gourdoscope which I call “the Donald Trump” because
it is big and warty and gnarled enough to start the rapture
when I insert it into his anus, take this gourdscycle and
suck some of the shit off of it because that is the shit of
your mother and your daughter and your wife and they
weren’t so great I think I don’t remember but if you suck it
now there will be more of their remains on me percentage
wise than if you were to suck it next Tuesday by which time
there will be a more complex arrangement of female
relative remains on my Gourd so come and get it and can
you put a veil over your face while you are up, Punjab? |
|
| |
Hop to Punjab! Wiki Wiki Wiki Wiki! |
|
| |
Medical attention, JesusHChrist. I will be a monkeys uncle.
No wait, you actually said medical assistance which means
you know what you are talking about and you know the law
and also that you are on the wrong side. But the Cowboys
beat the redskins here last Knight kimosabe, and on a steel
horse I ride. I walk these streets, a loaded six string on my
back and I play for keeps cause I might not make it back.
I’m a cowboy on a steel horse I ride. And I’m wanted dead
or alive. |
|
| |
I want you to look at my RayBans, King George the second,
as you suckle my gourdsycle, and imagine what it means to
be a cowboy, to always have to play for keeps, because you
never know whether you might not make it back, it’s a lot
of responsibility that you lazyboy recliner jockeys might not
totally understand how deeply a real American cowboy who
smokes Narlboro cigarettes and sips lemon Coke’s and eats
neck wafers at the corner store but always has to keep a
thirty odd six pointed directly at the back of the head of
his current ride, because they are you know having
problems with their boss or their daughter wants to
transfer to pastry cooking school which is more expensive
than the accounting program she is leaving, you know that
kind of shit, which rains on my parade because I can feel it
in your mouth. You are not sucking my gourd well because
of your petty concerns. So suck well kimosabe. The Lone
Ranger stands tall and white above you Punjab. Wiki wiki.
Mop up. Stiff upper lip. Roland. Georgie Porgie. Puddin n
pie. Let me lick a lotta Louis off your lower lip Larry. Look
at me in the Raybands negro. I’m a cowboy, and on a steel
horse I ride, after your closest female relative. Because I’m
wanted, negro, dead or alive. |
|
| |
You’re going to need medical assistance if you don’t
swallow just the way I like it. And don’t blink when I flick
my ash in your eyes. You have a moustach made of my
spunk and your closet female relatives iridescence. And I
don’t want you to shut your blue albino eyes because they
look like pretty gold to me and I lahk uht a laht. |
|
| |
Into the RayBands Jethro. Smile. |
|
| |
This is way better than the usual Lorem Ipsum generators. |
|
| |
It's reached the length where I expect it to morph into a [Vernon]
nuclear fusion idea. Once we spot a priapic palladium lattice,
we'll know we've arrived. Or perhaps a fuckatokamak; that has a
ring to it. |
|
| |
I'm not sure if it's wise to use the word "ring" around [JHC] at the moment. |
|
| |
[JHC] I may have missed this in my careful reading of your annotations, but are you a black guy who hates whites, or a white guy who hates blacks? Or just somewhere in the middle? |
|
| |
My theory is that he's running with Norman Mailer's idea of using
race as a sort of proxy for cool vs. uncool. |
|
| |
He's gone very quiet. I hope he's OK. |
|
| |