The Cat's Tongue

My cat could seemingly clean anything from his fur that the world could throw at it, including: oil, when he squeezed under the sump of the car; gloss and emulsion paint and every variety of dirt imaginable. Once his tongue was brought to bear on the offending material, it just seemed to vanish, the result I presume of a combination of physical and natural chemical debridement.

The Cat's Tongue product would imitate the action of a living cat. It would consist of a handle, complete with reservoir supply of "cat enzyme"; a throat, from which The Tongue would emerge, and a stomach container for depositing the removed dirt. In use, the rasping Tongue would be impregnated with enzyme and dragged across the offending stain. The Tongue would periodically retract into the mouth of its handle where the dissolved material would be scraped off to be deposited in the stomach for later emptying at your convenience.