h a l f b a k e r yIf ever there was a time we needed a bowlologist, it's now.
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To use The Boson's Curler you first enter
your sub-atomic particle of choice from
the comprehensive selection stored on
its
sister laptop. This is then downloaded
into
the handle of the curler tongs.
The tips of the tongs themselves are tiny,
like tweezers, and able
to adjust their
pressure, contour and
heating range to ensure that each hair
receiving its attention matches those of
the
traces of the cloud chamber images.
Every resulting eyebrow style is totally
unique.
Works best on those with long eyebrow
hair, or you could shave the rest
of your eyebrows and create a special
patch to
match that of your favourite particle
impact signature.
The Anti-matter Eyebrow Quiff (close up)
http://www.particle...revealed/980318.jpg [xenzag, Jul 01 2008]
No curling on the poop deck...
http://en.wikipedia...Curlingstoneold.JPG dangleberries also came a close second... [4whom, Jul 01 2008]
How to use...
http://www.videojug...o-use-curling-tongs curling tongs [xenzag, Jul 01 2008]
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Description (displayed with the short name and URL.)
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Sorry, I thought the bosun's curler was going to be a nautical euphamism for a notable lump of Richards in the Caribbean sea. A proudly unsinkable, ocean going 'evacuation', being cheered and clapped by all hands. |
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"Arrr, 'tis many a day since my good eye fell upon such an item, as to rival the Bosun's Curler." |
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Famous paths could be sold, at enormous cost, to those so inclined. |
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"Ooh, I do like your do"
"Yes, This is the Z boson from SPS at CERN, paid a fortune for it!"
" For the research?"
" No! For the do!, As iiiiffff...!"
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This is waaaaay over my head! |
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I'm disappointed that there are no actual bosons. I was imagining a rubber-lined hole in a super collider vacuum tube. The fuzzzt as the connection is made with your head. The stirring of great banks of helium-cooled magnets, ripping the zipper from your pants and flinging it far above. Not that you see any of this, of course. For your eyes--if they still work--are witness to a spectacular show of positron-electron annihilation, while mesons weighting as much as baseballs pelt your head into a perfectly-coffied insensibility. |
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Edited for eyebrow detail version. |
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It will be necessary to assure the Bosons Curler only generate integer spins. Pure Bosons are more radiant and you can have as many as you want bunched together. |
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Half integer spins are Fermions which may resist each other causing a frizzy harried look. The Fermions Curler has been baked and is popular with science professors and award winning scientist. |
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Einstein used the Fermions Curler on his head because he didnt yet appreciate the merits of the BoseEinstein (B-E) statistical mechanics of the Bosons Curler. |
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// Einstein used the Fermions Curler // |
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Did he risk catching anything from sharing curlers ? |
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Does the curler come with a special comb (some sort of diffraction grating ?) in case the hairdo develops quantum entanglements ? |
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I"m not sure if it makes more or less sense if I continually read it at Bosun's curler |
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Who said anything about making sense? |
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[8th of 7]
// Did he risk catching anything from sharing curlers ? //
// Does the curler come with a special comb (some sort of diffraction grating ?) in case the hairdo develops quantum entanglements ?// |
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Einstein indeed caught a scorching case of "non-commuting quantum observables" (a.k.a the Heisenberg uncertainty principle) when it was pointed out he was suffering with quantum entanglements. That is only one of many hazards in use of the state conscious Fermion and Boson Curlers. |
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Einstein intently disliked the concept of unexplained quantum entanglements and was known to refer to them as "spukhafte Fernwirkung". He insisted quantum entanglements could somehow comply with relativity without implying that "God plays dice." He denied true entanglement to the very end, claiming it was a problem with the local observers. |
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Sadly, if he had quantum entanglements while using the Bosons Curler then a diffraction grating might be the answer (with photon polarization). This is because bosons are more radiant but that still implies simultaneous state interaction between bosons. |
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Who beside Einstein, Podolsky, and Rosen (EPR) say entanglement is a bad thing? Among the best known applications of entanglement are superdense coding and quantum state teleportation. |
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On the other hand, throw in some more dimensions and divide infinity by zero and one could achieve the Holy Grail, Unification. ;-) |
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