Teenager Muting Ninja Gnomes

The youthful gang bellowed and kicked a beer bottle and knocked over trashcans as they jostled and staggered along the dark street. They stopped amid loud cursing when one member fell over a fence and landed in a flowerbed. Another leaned forward towards the mailbox to fill it with urine, a third shook a spray-can to paint the gate and the fourth headed towards the car antenna.

Spread out on the lawn and in the garden were apple-cheeked, innocent-looking gnomes. They were dressed in red and green but could hardly be seen in the dim light. Since their microphones registered the over 100-dBA noise and their IR sensors detected the intruding bodies, the gnomes activated to ninja mode.

Their stocking caps hinged back, and, with loud puffs of gas, two-meter, black rubber, ninja figures inflated swiftly from their heads. As the dark forms shook and swayed above the intruders, “COWABUNGA!” echoed from loudspeakers. The surprised and startled teenagers scattered dumbstruck. The last one, still in the tulips, writhed in pain and retreated when the speakers changed to Bing Crosby.