h a l f b a k e r yPoint of hors d'oevre
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Do you ever find yourself shouting "STOP THE WORLD, I WANT TO GET OFF". Well now there is an alternative to suicide, substance abuse and sectioning. Introducing the Sodthisforagameofsoldiers platform, a platform that is literally out of this world. Our unique patented platform is tethered by carbon nanotubes
to a space stationary satellite not orbiting high above the planet. Sophisticated control features ensure that the platform stays a constant 1 foot off the ground whilst never touching earth itself. Once on our Sodthisforagameofsoldiers platform you are free of all social, political and legal norms. That's right, whilst on the platform you cannnot be pursued for any crimes, debts, breaches of the ten commandments, mis-apostriphisation or even grammar faux pas. Just imagine sitting back, one foot off the ground and watching the world flash by with nary a care. Get your ticket now, climb aboard and literally get away from it all.
Important: Purchase of a ticket does not guarantee space availability. The operators will not be held responsible for anything howsoever caused. The Sodthisforagameofsoldiers platform is not moving relative to space however relative to earth it is moving quite fast. Care should be taken during embarcation and disembarcation. We suggest a short hop as the platform approaches. Infants and wheelchair users will be permitted to board first. Please refrain from issuing two-fingered salutes while on board.
Theme music is baked
http://www.youtube....watch?v=n7t7cGwN7_0
[outloud, Nov 27 2009]
[link]
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[+] for the sentiment, but... "International Waters" |
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// mis-apostriphisation or even grammar faux pas // |
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The rest is OK, but not that. Those lacking articulacy must be hunted down without mercy. |
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<cello>Dahhhhh dah. Dahhhhhhhhh dah. Dah da dah da
dah da DAh da, dah da Dah da, dah da Dah da <\cello> |
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I wish nothing ever happened on this island. |
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There are already at least a few meth and moonshine addicts in the backwoods of Idaho (and 'Idahos' throughout the world) who might read both paragraphs of your submission and wonder if you're offering them anything new. |
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Freedom from the rules of grammar? Nothing new. Even the one foot off the ground part might not be exactly novel. |
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If this isn't already baked, I'd say the toaster pastry version of it is already right there in our own back yards. |
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This is a capitalist democracy, meaning that, in general, if you can buy your way out of it, you can do it (USA). This is what they mean when they say it is a free country. Everyone is free to do whatever they want so long as they are willing and able to pay the price. If you are not willing or able, you will simply be shoved in jail or put to death or starved to death. That is how I see it, anyway. |
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Personally, if this were a socialist country, I would be paying
about a 70% tax for my daily needs. I must not be doing half
bad in this competitive exploitation. |
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I didn't mean to say anything particular about anything, it
was just something to say. Probably says more about me
bringing up socialism. |
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can we at least ban murder? |
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Um, nations own their airspace, that's a settled tennet of international law. And I think hot pursuit would cover an agent hopping on the platform even if it then crossed out of their jurisdiction. They might not be able to touch the satellite, but the platform is definitely accesible. |
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