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This could be a website that, in response to upcoming movie trailers, members could pledge money to the studio to cease the release of a movie. Being a website, it will make the process convenient and therefore might actually work. The website would keep a running total of the pledged amount and alert
the studio of that total. If enough people think the movie is bad enough to PAY to destroy it, the studio accepts the money from the website and ceases distribution and destroys all current stock of the film. Everyone wins, the studio makes possibly more money.
http://www.kickstarter.com/
only the opposite. sort of. [swimswim, Jun 22 2012]
Shuriken
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shuriken
"Throwing star". One of these can spoil your whole day. [8th of 7, Jun 26 2012]
Atlanta Nights
http://en.wikipedia...wiki/Atlanta_Nights
Can you write a book so awful a vanity publisher won't publish it? [MechE, Jun 22 2014]
[link]
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This idea may sound rant-ish but this idea came from the amount of money I would pay to kill Abraham Lincoln vampire hunter. |
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Hmmm - wouldn't the promise of easy cash for
destroying your bad movie encourage the production
of more bad movies? |
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I think natural apathy makes this impractical. They are still likely
to make more money from crap films than contributions to stop
them. Also, where exactly does the curve of badness start to
turn towards "so bad it's good"? Or, is "so bad it's good" just a
case of cynical mass hypnosis? |
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Well, this might stop people from making bad movie trailers. |
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Then there would be hardly anything to watch!
And what [hippo] said. |
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I am about to make a really bad movie. Can I have £50? (i.e. what [hippo] said) |
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Did someone say Nicholas Cage?
Someone should probably mention Nicholas Cage at this point. |
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I'm planning to hire Uwe Boll to direct a remake of Krull starring Kevin Sorbo and William Shatner. I'tll be 3D, but done in post-process to cut costs. |
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Can I have some money to not make this movie? |
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Bad trailers would be ones which are better than the
films, and there are quite a few of those. Maybe we
should stop people from making good trailers instead
of bad films. |
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// Someone should probably mention Nicholas Cage at this point // |
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And Leonardo DiCaprio. Oh, he was pretty good in "Inception", but it doesn't redeem him for "The Aviator", or indeed the film itself. |
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By the way, [Freefall], that had better be a joke, but in case it's not we're going to track you down and kill you, just to be on the safe side. |
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Nothing personal, you understand. |
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I would be happy with a "x percent artsy" warning
on each movie. In my not so humble opinion the
more time the writer and director devoted to
making a movie OMG THIS IS NOT JUST A MOVIE IT
IS ART!!! ONEHUNDREDANDELEVEN 11111!!!
instead
of making a compelling and interesting story the
crappier the movie is. exhibit a: the cube. exhibit
b: cloverfield. |
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interesting side note "shitty monster movie about
new york" yields cloverfield as the second Google
result. |
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There's a special place in Hell for people like you ... |
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Is it next to those who say what a great movie The
Italian Job was, and how good Mark Wahlberg was in
it? |
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Yes, very close. Slightly lower, though, and still underneath Judas Iscariot. |
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This would just result in a huge inflow of money to
India, to prevent the production of the crap
Bollywood churns out. |
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I rather thought the original was better. The one with
Micheal Caine and
whatsisname. |
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I also like Cube and in fact see it as budget-wise a paragon of
the kind of thing SF films should be. Primer is an even better
example. |
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Couldn't help myself. I liked District 9.
It's been three years by now, is that prawn coming back or what? |
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//The one with Micheal Caine and whatsisname// |
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whatsisname was the one in the Carry On films.
You're thinking of whojermaflip. (Had a glass ear;
most people didn't know that.) |
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// The one with Micheal Caine and whatsisname // |
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Sir Alec Issigonis. After all, the Minis were the real stars of the film ... |
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So what you're proposing is basically Kickstopper? |
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I've always wondered… What exactly is wrong with you
Brits that so many of these movies were allowed to be
made? |
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Sadism for inflicting them on the rest of the world. |
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Masochism for watching them in Britain ... |
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"Infamy! Infamy! They've all got it in for me!" |
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"Arson. Some kids, arsin' about, I expect." |
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I really like this idea, and it would work in an entirely homogenous world of me's (Think of that scene from Being John Malkovich). However it is not practical as there is no single definition of a bad movie. For example "Matthew McConaughey" is the definition of a bad movie for me and yet the fairer sex seem to swoon at these movies. |
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//What exactly is wrong with you Brits that so many of these movies were allowed to be made?//
We were broke, paying back war loans to the US, so couldn't afford to pay to not have them made. [-] |
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Maybe it's just time to start making good movies?
The whole Transformers / Jackass / (Insert name of
teen-attractant movie here) paradigm is getting a
little wearisome. |
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Also wish I could have stopped "Doom" from being released. I probably still owe blockbuster for torching that DVD |
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And "Pearl Harbor". That was a seriously crap movie. |
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WARNING - Annotation degeneration detected, probability of list formation now 85%. Protocols engaged. |
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Step away from the keyboard. |
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You have 5 seconds to comply. |
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I wish I could bun the Krull remake concept. In my heart of hearts, for nearly 30 years, I have carried that 5-bladed knife from that movie, and tried to throw it at my enemies like in the videogame of the same name. |
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Traditionally, a Glaive is a pole-arm. However, "The 1983 heroic fantasy film "Krull" the hero's first task is to find "The Glaive" - a shuriken-like weapon consisting of five arms, each with a short hooked blade projecting from it" |
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Thinking more about Krull - Freefall, I bet you could just take the original and give it a little more pop with some CGI special effects. Maybe a house beat with the soundtrack, for the youngsters. |
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You could still include Shatner, digitally inserting him into the action where needed, if his contract permits digital insertions. |
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//if his contract permits digital insertions// |
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Did I just read that? I thought we were talking movies, not proctology. |
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It would certainly give the line, "Pull your finger out !" a whole new dimension of meaning ... |
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Ditto to "to boldly go..." |
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If we're seriously talking about remaking 'Krull', why not
just go the step further and remake the even worse movie
that 'Krull' eclipsed in the box office? |
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In iambic pentameter, please. There must be some art. |
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'Twas once a movie, Hawk the Slayer called
That left the careless viewer quite appalled
In quality, left much to be desired
And to our fortune, was quietly retired
Not much later came a film called Krull
And while itself it really was quite dull
It left poor Hawk the Slayer in the dust
But mention that in certain company and it's sure to cause
a fuss... |
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/ paying for bad movies means more bad movies / |
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Buy the movie company and close it down? or |
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Pension off the "bad" scriptwriter s ? |
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How much will I get paid not to make an exact
(word
for word) adaptation of "Atlanta Nights"? |
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Honestly, however, it's almost impossible that a
company would deliberately try to make bad
movies, but it's also unlikely they would be able
to be paid enough to make it work. |
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At best this would be a stop loss move for them,
since by the time it's obvious a movie is bad
enough to want to cancel, it's already cost tens
(or hundreds) of millions, and even the worst
movie makes back tens of millions at the box
office. |
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Re The Eye of Argon...I've read worse... |
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I forgot what movie started the gears turning for this idea. Maybe it was sharknado. I would pay for them NOT to make the sequal, sharknado 2. |
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Depends what you look on it as...as SF film, a bit so-so...allegory of the general looniness of apartheid, not a bad one... |
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For example "In 1984 518 Coloured people were defined as White, 2 whites were called Chinese, 1 white was reclassified Indian, 1 white became Coloured, 89 Coloured people became African |
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Vic Wilkinson's case is significant. He was originally classified mixed race. Later he was defined as White. But the process of classification did not end there. He was also classified as Coloured, went back to being registered White, and conclusively became Coloured in 1984. " |
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Kafka, eat your heart out... |
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