h a l f b a k e r yIt's as much a hovercraft as a pancake is a waffle.
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Most solid fuel stoves are a rather uninspired box shape.
The BorgCo version looks like the firebox end of a steam locomotive, complete with gauge glasses, test-cocks, injectors, steam/vacuum brake, reverser, and a regulator handle (which works the flue damper).
Versions can be supplied with water-heating
pipework integrated into the firebox. Installation and maintenance of suitable Ramsbottom safety valves are the purchaser's responsibility and no liability can be accepted for any loss, damage or destruction of property by massive uncontained steam explosion, howsoever caused.
Sizes range from Ffestiniog 0-4-0 saddle tank (suitable for small rooms) through Stanier 4-6-0 5MT (for large rooms) up to Gresley A4 4-6-2 "Pacific" (suitable for large barns, aircraft hangers, and mainline railway stations).
Stoker not included. Special clean coal shovel suitable for cooking The Best Egg And Bacon In The World available by special order. Third party espresso nozzles are available but the manufacturer does not recommend their use and is not liable for any consequential injury or death.
“Steam Locomotive” Wood Burning Stove
https://www.farmsho...ticle.php?aid=30851
[scad mientist, Nov 13 2019]
"4472"
https://s3-eu-west-.../main/44/123087.jpg
Behold, the Beast ... [8th of 7, Nov 13 2019]
Wood_20Burning_20Mallard
[xenzag, Nov 13 2019]
Sir Thomas Bouch
https://en.wikipedi...g/wiki/Thomas_Bouch
"A smile, a song, and a cast-iron railway bridge design with a single-point failure mode that killed nearly eighty people ... " [8th of 7, Nov 13 2019]
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Very good, [scad], but we prefer <link> |
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[8th], Isn’t that The Flying Scotsman? |
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Frying Scotsman, presumably. |
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One that looks like the Mallard would be my
choice, of course. [see link] - laughs |
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Hmm. It does seem that [8th]'s emption has been pre-
empted. |
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I'm happy to munch away on his croissants. They
just need some jam to make them extra tasty. |
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The croissants look quite well toasted - must be a Mallard
Reaction. |
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To be fair, he's only proposing the interior of the locomotive's firebox area, and not a model of the entire engine, though I'm still eating his croissants. yummmmy |
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We acknowledge a certain amount of prior art, however this is different. It's a coal-burner, it's a replica of the back of the boiler (including firebox), and it's available as more than one design variant of locomotive. |
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Oh, and the Frying Scotsman is a real fish and chip shop ... |
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Your humble grovelling is accepted. A simple act of
contrition will act as confirmation eg a video of a
convincing imitation of a pigeon pecking up scraps
on a busy thoroughfare. This is where you need to
use your dormant imagination. |
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No problem; name the time, the place and the busy thoroughfare and we'll set up the video kit and make a movie of you being run down by our smoke-belching coal-burning steamroller. What sort of scraps do you prefer ? We only have GM ones ... |
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My grandfather was a steam locomotive engineer back in the
day. Diesels later. Dad and my uncle became what they
called "Engineers, but not the fun kind." which I thought was
inspired at least in part by their dad. |
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Uncle Pete was head engineer on the Golden Gate Bridge for
many years. His job was to make sure it didn't collapse.
Guess he did his job. He gave my dad an old rivet from when
they were being replaced. Still keeps in on his mantle. |
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"... so to summarize, Mr. President, the catastrophic collapse was initiated because at some point in the past a single, absolutely critical rivet was removed from the structure, but by an oversight was not replaced. All the deaths and destruction and loss and tragedy can be clearly traced back to that one missing rivet ..." |
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"I was told to take any rivet except that one but to be
honest, I was rebellious and didn't like being told what to
do. I now realize my mistake and wish to return the rivet
and suggest it be used to help build the new bridge. No,
don't thank me, it's the least I can do." |
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... oh, and can I have a last cigarette before you tie the blindfold on ? Where do I stand ? By the post, yes, right." |
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"... hey wait, on second thought. Damn it! I'm gonna quit
smoking! Got any gum?" (Firing squad holds up their rifles.)
"I said GUM! GUM! THANKS! Jeez, what a bunch of morons." |
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By the way, prosecuting crimes has been outlawed in San
Francisco so this could never happen. |
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That sounds like in improperly worded sentence but it's not. |
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//All the deaths and destruction and loss and tragedy can be
clearly traced back to that one missing rivet // but also to
the engineer who designed a bridge with a single-point failure
mode. |
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Ah yes, Sir Thomas Bouch, the doyenne of the "house of cards" school of civil engineering ... |
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By the way, they named a small bridge after him when he
passed away a few years ago. has a plaque, a name and
everything. |
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// has a plaque, a name and everything. // |
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Before crossing said bridge, cool though it may be, we would insist on comparing the "design" and "as built" drawings and checking that the full complement of rivets were present and correct. |
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//they named a small bridge after him when he passed
away// They called a bridge "Uncle Pete"? That is so cool! In
fact, even if they called it "The Peter J. Remulac Memorial
Small Bridge", that's quite cool. |
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My cousin had a cruise ship named after him. Well, he was
named "Giles" in 1952 and the RMS Carinthia was named in
1955, so it was quite a while after. |
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(tell them you get it) I get it. (phew) |
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Wouldn't it be engineering excellence if the point failure mode origin was the top right rivet of the naming plaque? |
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No, it would be the most exquisite irony imaginable (unless the rivet was an austenitic alloy, in which case it would be steely). |
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