h a l f b a k e r yExperiencing technical difficulties since 1999
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So the kids (and others) won't die when they fall down the stairs. The bottom riser opens up and lets out a giant suddenly inflated (explosives involved) couch-like airbag, which, unlike an automotive airbag, does not deflate immediately.
One hitch is how to tell when this thing should be deployed.
Infra-red beams on each stair, I suppose, connected to a clock, and if too many are tripped too quickly, then POP.
Another hitch is my four year old would figure this thing out in about 30 seconds and spend the rest of the day leaping off the top step. Not much different than now, though, except he only leaps from the fourth or fifth step, usually.
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Annotation:
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an audible cue " yeeeuuugggchhhhh" might work (with adults) |
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you've been bouncing on the trampoline staircase again, haven't you? |
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Maybe if you wanted to be cruel (Only for adults), if it was tripped too many times in quick sucession it might start only working sometimes. |
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But what if you land before the bottom of the staircase? |
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hhmmmm, a durex employee. |
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//if you land before the bottom of the staircase// you probably did not fall that far, and won't be too hurt. Get up and throw yourself the rest of the way down, onto the airbag. |
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[po]: ha (and, no, this was not actually inspired by the Trampoline Staircase. It's been floating around in my head a while, inspired by my four year old's death defying leaps from ever higher stairs. I only posted it because a promise is a promise, and both kids are asleep. Best I could do on short notice.) |
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oh yes, I have come across the: great minds think along some sort of parallax ( is that a word?)thing. |
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3 times this week actually... |
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This is really only safe if each stair has its own airbag. You also have to wear sensors on your head and buttocks 24 hours a day. If the stairs detect that your head is moving downward and your buttocks upwards, it instantly deploys all the airbags below you. |
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...but fools seldom differ... |
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hey, [po], how many times this week you come across fools seldom differing? |
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If you're like me, you are listening to some frightening techno music right now. Eep. |
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Anyway, It's a cool idea. [ ] However, if I child is JUMPING willingly from the staircase, I think it's natural selection that the child dies. |
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I'm going to hell, aren't I? |
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Only if you buy the optional hellfire and brimstone stairbag. Or if you forget to buy one at all. |
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[NS] so far, the child only jumps high enough to break an arm or thereabouts. If he learns about the stairbag, then he'd jump from high enough to die, so if the bag wasn't there the next time, that's not natural selection, but plain cruelty. |
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[phundug] I like your sensors bit, but you'd in reality only need a bag, at most, every 5 or 7 stairs, provided it can stop you (couch-like). |
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Expect an outraged note from a Soap Opera executive this evening, [oxen]. + |
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Imagine being ON the step when the stairbag deploys. You and the accident victim (hopefully) only cross paths rather than collide midway up the stairs.
The top stairbag, sensing your impending rude landing, also deploys. BOOF! and back up you go, heading back whence you came...
It sounds a lot like a big, architectural-scale game of PONG.
Bun for fun |
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Yes, [elhigh], that's a problem, I guess. [half] had also mentioned the problem of being at the foot of the stairs when the bag deployed and getting plastered to the opposite wall. (don't know where that anno went. I hope I didn't delete it somehow by accident; it was a good criticism.) |
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My point is, I am on the fence as to whether this is a safety device or a form of entertainment, so I don't know if I should add more boring sensors to prevent these conflicts, or make sure to provide plenty of space for the people in the way of the airbag to fly through, or what. |
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This is the third time this has come up in random today. |
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An alternative solution would be that all of the steps would click flat to form a slide, and you could elegantly swoop down to the bottom of the stairs into the comfy airbag.... |
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