h a l f b a k e r yIt might be better to just get another gerbil.
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Okay - in the interests of full disclosure this idea does not really consist of spray-on implants - that's just one of the names that came to mind of a momentary drive-by misread of a group of signs outside a strip mall / medical clinic.
But in need of an idea to support the concepts, the following
evolved.
In Southern California, we have a fish called sculpin. It has no fear, and no enemies, and it lays around doing whatever it pleases except when it's eating. This is because the fish contains a toxin, that should you be unlucky enough to be pierced by one of the dorsal spines, will make your hand swell up as large as your head.
This, of course, hurts. The cure consists of putting your hand in the hottest possible water that you can tolerate, since the toxin breaks down under heat.
Enter the twenty-four hour breast enlargement. Trained medical technicians carefully make a series of injections of a proprietary blend of sculpin toxin and slow release novacaine compounds.
Your breasts, while lacking sensation, are expanded until such time as the toxin wears off. Probably good for an evening, with the appropriate low cut evening gown.
Disclaimer: No fish or mammary glands were harmed in the making of this idea. Although sculpin are VERY tasty, and I have cautiously slain my share.
Exculpation
http://www.wordrefe...inition/exculpation
Basis for the pun [csea, Nov 03 2010]
Snake Milker
http://www.npr.org/...p?storyId=125036229
Similar duties [csea, Nov 10 2010]
Not as dangerous as the above job, link to the chemistry involved (over my head I'm afraid)
http://oai.dtic.mil...dentifier=ADA054925
[normzone, Nov 10 2010]
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Annotation:
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21, I think he means, no natural enemies. Which isn't to say that humans aren't part of nature, or that we aren't an enemy of most living things, or.. never mind |
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So, not exactly spray-on. |
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+ for the concept of temporary breast enlargement using a "natural" product. Possibly of much interest in Hollywood! |
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<word nerd> I suppose the after effects would require 'exsculpination' </word nerd> |
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(I was taught to toss back sculpin when fishing as a boy, never tasted the filets.) |
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//Trained medical technicians// meanwhile, the lo-cost hippy alternative is to simply hug a fish |
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(csea), I'm assuming you threw them back cautiously, or you'd know what I'm going to tell (pocmloc). I'm told that the smallest sting from the smallest fish feels like electric shocks shooting up your arm. Probably a fetish to be derived there, maybe I should get in the market early. |
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Not that I need this myself, but it's a great idea! [+] (spray on croissant) |
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Can we get a variation of this for male enhancement? |
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A friend of mine wants to know. |
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Well, it would be good for video purposes, and despite the numbing agents you could take your pleasure purely in your partner's pleasure. I'm not willing to be a test pilot though. |
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Watch now, this will get baked and I'll only get a free sample out of it. |
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//I'll only get a free sample out of it.// |
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*Only* a free sample?!? If only we could all get free
samples of (_some_) HB ideas. |
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//Can we get a variation of this for male enhancement? |
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A friend of mine wants to know.// |
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I read somewhere about bee stings having this effect...er...I mean my friend did, and no it wasn't from a letter that began; Dear Penthouse...
nuh uh, no sir. |
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What kind of bees, and where do they live? So I can avoid them, I mean. |
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ugh jeez, everywhere apparently.
Well that's quite enough added to 'things I can't unsee' file for one day. |
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I'm going to go do some yard work, <shudder> where bees and gerbils and such are doing what they are supposed to be doing. |
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<tries, and fails, to shake image of Ace Ventura saying "I love bees...if it's cold enough."> |
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My sweetheart thought of a variant on this idea today - Sculpin Lip Balm. |
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I'm going to have to stop killing them in the dark (they come out to feed at night, and are rarely seen at day), and began capturing them for my sculpin farm. |
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"Wanted: Sculpin Milkers. Entry level positions available, no experience required, must be able to lift three-quarters of a pound. Manual dexterity and high tolerance for pain a plus." |
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See [link] for a similar profession. |
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i suspect that most women would forgo such a short enhancement, realizing that the swelling might well cause a permanent change to the structure of the breast's structure similar to the effects of lactation. (sagging). |
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I'd guess that that would be decided by doseage and placement. The initial medical trial results published could be a revenue generating website in itself. |
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and individual sensitivity.... |
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