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On the heels of our hugely successful Overused Metaphor Thesaurus, we are releasing our latest word processing innovation.
Capabable of taking the transcript of any speech, eliminating flowery metaphors and reducing it to a requested grade level, this tool will quickly produce a "stupid dumbfuck"
out of a "nattering nabob of negativity"
Podzinger: State of the art Speech To Text.
http://itre.cis.upe...rchives/002785.html
Jesus is Lord = in beijing this morning ? [jutta, Jan 28 2006]
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Annotation:
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I assume there would be a compression setting: 1 being unchanged, 10 being a blank space where the point would have been if there had been one. |
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I'd not be insignificantly unhappy if I were exempt from the unfortunate position of not being incapable of seeing a 'lite' version that simply resolved multiple negatives. |
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Once you've worked it out, you can tell me whether I'd like it or not as I'm not sure myself. |
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It would also come in handy when reading legal documents. |
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Plausibility is stretched to the limits with this one. |
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But [bristolz], current auto summarization technology and text analysis tools are at the cusp of being able to process speech in this fashion. |
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When translated by the tool: |
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[bristolz], just get me a whole bunch of pizza and Jolt and I'll have it ready by Monday. |
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