SodModule 2003

Many people living in the desert southwest feel the need to have large rolling lawns as if they were some English country squire. This leads to wasteful sprinkler use, depleting valuable water resources.

It may be possible for these people to attain their desired greenery in a more environmentally friendly way. I envision sod farms where square meter SodModules are grown directly on a frame containing a grid of small pipes. These pipes drip water into a subgrass matrix of polyacrylimide gel. A pipe skeleton is laid down in front of buildings and these lawn modules are plugged in - as many as is necessary.

These modules incorporate the conservation features of polyacrylamide as well as Israeli-style drip irrigation. Best of all, if a meteorite punctures one of your modules, just lift it out and install a fresh one from the farm. The old one could go back for repair and recultivation. Lawn lovers would pay for a subscription to SodModule for this sort of upkeep and replacement. If they did not pay their bills, the lawn repo men would come at night and take the lawn away.

I will hear no protests and invocation of xeriscaping as the correct approach. You all know these green lawn fanataics are out there and they will not go away. Given this, why not take their money?