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Skuge
sssssssssssssshhhhhhhhheeeeeeeeaowwwwwww | |
I was watching luge today on TV, briefly. It seems to involve a man
in lycra lying on a sled and sliding down a bobsled run feet-first.
It's all very well and good, but it's not very obvious that the lugist is
actually doing anything. Don't get me wrong - I can believe that he
is doing all
kinds of subtle things with his muscles, but to the
uninitiated it looks like you'd be just as well off sending a
streamlined brick down the track.
I also watched a little figure-skating. Clearly this involves
tremendous skill, but there's no apparent risk factor other than a
possible gusset-malfunction. (Is it me, by the way, or are there far
more legs-akimbo-whilst-turning-around moves than are healthy?)
So, to save time and improve the enjoyment of the winter olympics,
just send skaters down the luge course. On their skates, obviously.
Probably not as fast as a prone luger (?), but jolly exciting I should
think. (They would probably not skuge in pairs, and would probably
not attempt spins and catches on the way down, but this is clearly
another option.)
So, in summary, send skaters down the luge course. Damn - put that
way, it seems far too simple and obvious.
Poetry
http://en.wikipedia...948_Summer_Olympics
[hippo, Feb 16 2010]
Mandatory outfits
http://www.salon.co...umes/slideshow.html
[wagster, Feb 16 2010]
Tarmac not ice
http://forum.ctc.or...ic.php?f=24&t=32181
This may be a way forward [pocmloc, Feb 16 2010]
[link]
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Meanwhile, over at the ice rink, a streamlined brick has a colourful gusset attached, and is sent spinning across the ice... |
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One tiny misjudgment and the skater would be smeared over the surrounding landscape as a thin film of Humanberry jam ... |
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We would pay a dollar to see that. [+] |
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A human is more bean than berry. |
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Before this recent fatality on the luge, which seems to be alluded to very subtly, there was some room to wonder if it could be a sport involving skill at all. Given that marginal errors can result in extreme consequences, as we have wtinessed, there shouldn't be any more room for doubt. |
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What's that you say?
The hasbeen 'celebrity' contestants
from Dancing on Ice shoved down a luge run that connects to
a frozen ski-jump track? That's brilliant. The fact that there
is a pool of angry snapping turtles for them to land in at the
other end is the deal clincher. |
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Will there, can there, be full barrel rolls, 360° triple spins and half-pipe axels? |
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//a streamlined brick down the track// |
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Curluge would also be a more watchable combo, especially the broomers.
Hurry! Haaard! |
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[+] but only if the lower end of the Skuge course is combined with the ski-jumping ramp ... and the landing area for the ski-jump is the (summer olympics) diving pool ... and of course I'm assuming that the Skuge event will form part of the new Winter Biathlon, so contestants will be expected to do some rifle shooting on the way down ... and poetry used to be an Olympic event (link) so we should incorporate that somehow. |
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Hmmm - re 21Q's Standing Luge - yes, prior art somewhat,
though I note that it explicitly does not involve skates.
However, I'm happy for this to be mfd'd if people think it's
too close. |
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wouldn't work: lugers pull 5G's. |
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anyways...
[marked-for-deletion] bad taste. |
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So? A strong man can support the weight of four people plus
himself. Also, there is a choice regarding the exact course to
follow - the skuger could opt for a course/speed which gave
lower peak G's, at the expense of speed; or they could risk
the high-G course if they thought they could stand it. |
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The main thing missing from this idea is the ridiculous outfits. It may have been implied, but I think it needs explicitly stating that the skaters would have to wear full figure-skating costumes while trying to remain upright at 300kph. (link) |
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//So? A strong man ... // at 150kmh ? while doing deep knee bends in various directions ? get real. |
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//choice regarding the exact course to follow// not so much if somebody went ahead of you, considering the length of skate runners vs. length of luge runners and the weight involved. |
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[FlyingToaster] The fact that an idea might be in bad taste is not, by itself, grounds for deletion (some people here would never be able to post anything if that were the case). If an idea contained nothing except for a 'bad taste' comment, that would be different. Personally, I don't think this idea is, or was intended to be, in bad taste. |
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I would point out that I had and posted this idea before I
heard about the lugist's death, and that therefore it was
the accident which was badly timed rather than this idea.
However, I suspect this would be in bad taste. |
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//get real.// This is, isn't it not not, the halfbakery? If we
are saying that skating down a luge course is, per se,
impossible, then I suspect this is a challenge waiting to
be, ah [whatever the elegant word is for responding to a
challenge]. |
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The objections regarding G-forces are easily surmounted, I think. First, the skugers could drag a toe pick, wear a frilly skirt, or otherwise keep their speed low, and make surviving the turns part of the strategy of the race: "Swenson's incredible roostertail of ice is getting all over his tutu as he slows for the turn, but he lets off quite early--he's going for a 2.5 gee line, evidently confident that his grotesque thighs can take the strain...". Or, obviously, a separate skuge track could be built that wouldn't have as sharp a set of turns in it. (+) |
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//have as sharp set of turns// considering the height of a luger at 1.5ft and the height of an adult in skates at > 6ft, you'd have to make the turns *much* looser. |
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[baconbrain], thank you for the mental image of burly strongmen in tutus skating down a luge track. If I hadn't already bunned the idea that would have convinced me. |
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On a more serious note, some runners wear small parachutes to increase drag while training. Maybe using those would keep the skater's speed low enough for safety. |
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//no apparent risk factor other than a possible gusset-malfunction// |
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Apparently you haven't seen the movie "Blades of Glory" ... |
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//whatever the elegant word is for responding to a challenge// |
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That's the one. Surmounted. |
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Skate blades fitted to hands, elbows, knees, bum and head as well as feet (link) |
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Oh for goodness' sake. It is sad that the luger died, and this
idea isn't meant to play on that incident. Can we take this
one outside now? |
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No real risk for skating? Um, hello? People throwing
you about by your waist while you get dizzy in mid-
air wearing narrow metal blades? Go try it. |
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//I thought...// it was. I did take it for granted that the timing was accidental rather than deliberate. I didn't hear, myself, 'til the end of the weekend. |
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I just read in brit. there is a publication ban on death footage, that explains it. |
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Canadian and American channels have it on loop, slow mow, super slow mo and ultra zoom. |
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hope I don't get bored enough to go looking for it. |
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pretty much all of this is becoming bad-taste...
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