Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Sing Alongs For Vibrators

This "special" CD gives you privacy when you need it most: while masturbating
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This CD is specially formatted white noise made to drown out the sound of a vibrator (eg the Hitachi Magic Wand or the Rabbit) so to avoid embarrassing questions from roommates/housemates. "Why were you drilling at 11:30 last night?" You get the picture. Of course the truth could be spoken, but this CD is for those shy types. This is better than regular music because it has lots of buzzing sounds, but combined with other sounds to make it sound nice and sexy. The CD won't pause when it goes to another track; this is important because silence when switching to another track (the only sound is that of the vibrator) can really break the flow. I think I am not alone with this problem, but fishbones or flakey croissants will reveal...
MoodyDeirdre, Feb 05 2004

(?) Chas and Dave http://www.chasndave.freeserve.co.uk/
I've just noticed the comedy value of "Rabbit" [Fishrat, Oct 04 2004]

[link]






       I thought this would be a vibrator that buzz's a tune
Hold on, I'm coming. Sam and Dave.
sufc, Feb 05 2004
  

       Chaz and Dave.
Fishrat, Feb 05 2004
  

       thats the ticket, fishy...
po, Feb 05 2004
  

       What, no Moody Blues?
jurist, Feb 05 2004
  

       Guess I'm just a hopeless romantic. Literally.
Fishrat, Feb 05 2004
  

       yeah hopeless!
po, Feb 05 2004
  

       Always worth a goog n' le... linky.
Fishrat, Feb 05 2004
  

       do you think this might make deirdre less moody?
po, Feb 05 2004
  

       The vibrator should also be shielded in some way to ensure it doesn't cause interference with next door's TV picture
hazel, Feb 05 2004
  

       Like sufc, I must confess disappointment that this was not a proposal for a National Vibrator Orchestra, performing great musical classics using differently pitched appliances. I think it would be a winner. A vibrator rendition of Serge Gainsborg's 'Je t'aime' would be a total show stopper...

buzz, buzz-buzz-buzz, buzzzzzzz, buzz-buzz, buzz
(oh, je t'aime)
buzz, buzz-buzz-buzz etc.
DrBob, Feb 05 2004
  

       Stuck in the Middle?
oneoffdave, Feb 05 2004
  

       //The vibrator should also be shielded in some way// - isn't that what they're designed for, speaking as a novice in such matters?
PeterSilly, Feb 05 2004
  

       All by myself...
Lacus Trasumenus, Feb 05 2004
  

       I meant electronically speaking! Hungover today, can't think of the right words.
hazel, Feb 05 2004
  

       A Faraday caged vibrator. Right.
Detly, Feb 05 2004
  

       Is that from experience.Hazel
sufc, Feb 05 2004
  

       Anything by Steely Dan. Thop for some strange reason I have the sound of a Stylophone in my mind whenever I read this. Some bizzare Stylophone/Theramin/Vibrator hybrid springs to mind.
oneoffdave, Feb 05 2004
  

       It happened to a friend of mine. No, really it did!
hazel, Feb 05 2004
  

       slow, slow, quick, quick, slow
hippo, Feb 05 2004
  

       I was expecting some version of kareoke where the microphone doubles as a vibrator...   

       [Donna Summers] ....Ooooohhhh....love to love you, baby......   

       [MoodyDeirdre].....when I think about you, I touch myself.....
normzone, Feb 05 2004
  

       I preferred the previous version of your anno jutta. :) The more zzz's the better. (Yay! they're back)   

       <silly question> would this CD drown out other ambient noise resulting from this activity? </sq>
Lacus Trasumenus, Feb 05 2004
  

       "Heat Seeking Pleasure Machine" (Paul Mac w/ Tex Perkins) has a lot of buzzing bass...
Detly, Feb 06 2004
  

       [Lacus Trasumenus] Women are generally mostly quiet when masturbating, apart from a bit of heavy breheheathing. It's not really like in those films.
squeak, Feb 06 2004
  

       {squeak] thanks for clearing that up :)   

       Ya learn something new about masturbation every day.
Lacus Trasumenus, Feb 07 2004
  

       Flight of the Bumblebee? Now with bees!
phoenix, Feb 07 2004
  

       How about a stealth vibrator. One that cancels its own noise.   

       If we're going to go after this, can there be other tracks? I don't know anyone who can keep it up (sorry) for 78 minutes, but perhaps other tracks for other activities: 1 anti bed squeak 2 anti Ohmigod Ohmigod Ohmigod 3 anti YESYESYES (note: this wouldn't be the CD screaming NO! NO! NO! Talk about a buzzkill) 4 maybe something to set the tone, for when the house is empty: assorted slurps, mmm's, and slapping sounds.
elhigh, Jun 13 2005
  

       mmm, you just can't beat those slurping and slapping sounds.   

       I think the person whose vibe was interfering with next doors tv must have been using some cheap foreign import or something that doesn't comply with regulations ;-)
Salmon Of Doubt, Oct 31 2005
  
      
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