h a l f b a k e r yThe phrase 'crumpled heap' comes to mind.
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The city I live in has a large student population and, consequently, a lively night-life. The main routes through the city centre are lined with bars and it is not unusual to have to weave through the drunken human bollards that occupy the road. Prior to 11pm you can sound your horn to warn the inebriate
about to step off of the kerb that you are there but post 11pm, this is illegal.
Flashing your headlights might work but this is usually interpteted as allowing them to cross so could be risky for all concerned.
A couple of white strobes, mounted either in the grille or in the existing headlights would be tirggered, like the horn, via a button on the stalks or steering wheel. This short, high intensity burst of light should attract anyone's attention.
Obviously the frequency of the flashes must avoid triggering photo-sensitive epilepsy.
Suitable devices can be found at [link]
Covert strobes
http://www.galls.co...tail.jsp?item=GR121 Hide these in your existing lights [oneoffdave]
Baked?
http://www.brainyqu...otes/s/q102556.html [oneoffdave, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]
Baked?
http://www.brainyqu...otes/s/q102556.html [my face your, Oct 04 2004]
Chaos2
http://www.gt-elect...weapon/wep-test.htm Robot with flipper [oneoffdave, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]
[link]
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They probably aren't looking at you anyway. If someone were about to step in front of my car I'd sound the horn whatever time it was and take the consequences. Better than having a death on your conscience. |
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If Horns are illegal, and strobes can induce epileptic fits, then why not mount high pressure water cannons on the front of your car. They could be controlled from within the car, and be powered via the battery. The reservoir could be kept in the boot and, with the addition of Anti-Student enzymes could be particularly affective in removing these inebriated human 'bollards' |
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Alternatively you could simply mount an inflatable 'lout-plow' to safely remove any objects from the path of your car. |
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Forget about the lights and water. I think a modified "pulse detonation engine" would do the trick.
This engine has a controlled explosion which sends a wave out. I know some MIT folks who among trying to implement these engines for air/spacecraft are looking at ways to use these BURSTS of waves as crowd control. Not sure how much noise they'll make but it would sure keep the drunks from falling into the road. |
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[8th] Great suggestion. Now I have all the justification I ned to go and buy a fire engine. Just lash one of the high pressure hosereel lines to the roof and hey presto! |
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I had thought of infrasound devices that would cause them to lose bowel control but thought isolating the passenger compartment of the car might prove problematic and failure to isolate it would make it unpopular. |
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I had thought of a 'lout-plough' but thought that was pandering to the image of the pedestrian hating driver. |
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In the classic movie "Soylent Green", the poice use scoops (like earthmovers) to scoop up rioters en masse and dump them into containers. Maybe some sort of flipper, rather than a plough blade ? |
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// that was pandering to the image of the pedestrian hating driver // |
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And you point is .......... ? |
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Hmmm...a flipper in the style of Chaos2 from the UK's "Robot Wars" [link] would be entertaining and would see students thronging the road ready to be hurled through the air. |
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It would have to deposit them back on the road as I don't fancy arriving home with 35 drunken students in the back of the car/lorry. |
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Alternatively we could turn this problem to our advantage, once you have accumulated 30 odd drunken students, you could deposit them at the local halls of residence and then invoice the council for this service. That way we could recover a small percentage of the tax we waste on allowing these 'yoofs' to pickle their livers at our expense.... great! |
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Right on, [Cw!s2Phar] ! They should be ashamed of themselves ! Disgusting ! When I was a student, I NEVER went out and got bladdered on cheap beer at a local pub, then ate a massive greasy kebab and went staggering up the centre of the street with my arms out, making a noise like a Tie Fighter and chasing one of my drunken friends who was making a noise like an X-wing ...... no, never did that... no.... well, maybe one, or twice..... or maybe a few times ......hum. |
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<realises feebleness of position, shuts up>. |
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People who object to horns going off outside their windows in the middle of the night might also dislike bursts of intensely bright light. (Or watercannons.) |
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It's not so much about the local population disliking horns, more that it's an offence under UK law to do so after 11pm and before 7am. |
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I suspect that once these become common, there will be knee-jerk legislation banning water cannon, lout-ploughs and strobes too. |
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Am I wrong in believing that, under UK law it's also legal to kill Welshmen against a specific wall from 12ft with a longbow? Or that every boy older than 12 must engage in at least one hour of archery practice a week. I'm certain it's still legal for a lady to request the use of a policeman's helmet if she needs to relieve her bladder..... |
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The longbow/welshman thing was technically legal in York until last year IIRC. Policemen are required to shield pregnant woman with their cloaks should they need to urinate in the street. |
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I love it (+). However, this may bring more students into the streets:
One student=>One car=>One strobe
Another student sees the strobe, takes an e and goes out to see how the strobe affects their vision while dancing
Two students=>Two cars=>Two strobes
etc etc etc...
Eventually, the cars will be completely blocked, their strobes making the street a virtual dance party and the horns of those that don't give a toss about the law generating the 'music'. |
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//The longbow/welshman thing was technically legal in York until last year IIRC. Policemen are required to shield pregnant woman with their cloaks should they need to urinate in the street.// |
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Where I live we used to have a problem with the less civilized members of our society. They'd very occasionally spit, piss and deposit rubish in the streets. We've always had laws against it, but it was impossible to get prosecuted. The government recently implemented a spot $77 fine for such things and people are finally taking it seriously. |
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The other day I saw a mother force her child to pee in public into a clear plastic bag, which was then deposited (untied) into a leaky rubbish bin on a steep slope. |
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It was then that I realized you can't legislate common sense or decency. |
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No doubt the people of York will continue to slay Welshmen with longbows long after the law is repealed. |
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>The longbow/welshman thing was technically legal in York until last year IIRC. |
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I'm so glad the burghers of York took the time to repeal that one. Must have made a big difference to the quality of life up there. |
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That's the problem [FM], common sense isn't all that common. Perhaps there should be exams in it. |
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// also legal to kill Welshmen against a specific wall from 12ft with a longbow? // |
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York ? No, Chester; on the edge of the "Marches", the old border with Wales. It was legal to shoot a Welshman from the walls with a longbow during the hours of darkness (The defence of "Well, he sounded a bit Welsh to me, yer honour, and after all, it was dark" was considered acceptable). There is also a small bounty on the corpse, payable at the Town Hall. |
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// you can't legislate common sense or decency // |
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Quite true - that's why we use the longbows. I have a night sight on mine - best Cheshire Yew wood. The skill and power of the Cheshire archers is legendary, and they recieved the highest payment of any of the bowmen on the field of Agincourt, acknowledging the speed, power and accuracy of their shooting. Ah, happy days. |
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