h a l f b a k e r yLeft for Bread
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The silent alarm clock simply tells you you're late. It displays what the time would be several hours after you set the nonexistant alarm to go off. If you wanted to be awoken at 4:00 am it displays 7:00 am. In your state of panic and inferred oversleep you will wake up immediately.
Best of all,
when you actually do oversleep, the silent alarm clock displays a much earlier time. You will then awaken gently and face your terrible day well rested and refreshed.
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Umm... this is the time-honoured (get it ? *time* honoured.... no, *time*... ah nevermind) method of getting one's arse out of the fartsack since the invention of the rooster back in the 12th century. |
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I thought waking up in the morning in the 12 century was more of surprise than alarm. |
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Waking up in the morning was a surprise in the
12th century? Was the mortality rate in those days
really that high? |
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Thanks in part to my ancestors, the mortality rate in the
12th century was very high, and very well-timed. It usually
went something like this: |
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Noon-ish: Viking longboats sighted. |
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Just before sundown: Vikings send heavily-armed
emissaries, bearing goods from far-off lands, and make
token attempt to trade peacefully. Townspeople retreat in
terror to nearest defensive tower or stone church (arrow-
trading optional). |
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Just before dawn: Vikings return in force, more arrows and
other projectiles are exchanged. Somebody pushes
'snooze'. |
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Nine minutes later: Vikings sack and burn town. |
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It was, however, anything but silent. In that sense, at
least, this idea is an improvement. |
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Try telling that to King Athelstan. |
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