h a l f b a k e r yContrary to popular belief
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Umm... this is the time-honoured (get it ? *time* honoured.... no, *time*... ah nevermind) method of getting one's arse out of the fartsack since the invention of the rooster back in the 12th century. |
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I thought waking up in the morning in the 12 century was more of surprise than alarm. |
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Waking up in the morning was a surprise in the
12th century? Was the mortality rate in those days
really that high? |
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Thanks in part to my ancestors, the mortality rate in the
12th century was very high, and very well-timed. It usually
went something like this: |
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Noon-ish: Viking longboats sighted. |
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Just before sundown: Vikings send heavily-armed
emissaries, bearing goods from far-off lands, and make
token attempt to trade peacefully. Townspeople retreat in
terror to nearest defensive tower or stone church (arrow-
trading optional). |
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Just before dawn: Vikings return in force, more arrows and
other projectiles are exchanged. Somebody pushes
'snooze'. |
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Nine minutes later: Vikings sack and burn town. |
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It was, however, anything but silent. In that sense, at
least, this idea is an improvement. |
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Try telling that to King Athelstan. |
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