h a l f b a k e r yExpensive, difficult, slightly dangerous, not particularly effective... I'm on a roll.
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This garden rock/bauble/fake bush is hardwired to
the fire
detection system and its own power supply, or a
manual
switch that blows the airbag in a manner similar, but
a bit
more slowly and larger than a car airbag.
Fire escape shrub
Fire_20escape_20shrub
Prior Art [8th of 7, Oct 11 2020]
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Annotation:
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Bonus bun if, after deployment, the homeowner can add standard moveable livestock fencing to the edges, to form an 'instant' bouncy house/trampoline-type unit for the yard apes*. |
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*Who need a relaxing screamy outlet after losing their home and, more importantly, their YuGiOh deck(s), to the conflagration. |
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You could adapt one of those ghastley three metre tall inflatable illuminated Santas into a Fireman with outstretched arms ... |
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// losing their home and, more importantly, their YuGiOh deck(s), to the conflagration. // |
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Never mind that ... save the Betamax tapes with the original off-air recordings of Star Trek TOS ... |
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^ Clever, you should post that. |
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Additional option: inflatable Jesus lifejackets and survival rafts... |
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A Jesus-shaped steerable canopy parachute is unlikely to be practical. |
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"Aim for the bushes" - The Other Guys |
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// trying to be nice or just make me paranoid // |
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One of those options has very low probability, but then again paranoia is inappropriate; it's an unjustified perception of persecution, and everyone really does hate you. |
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There's a third possibility, of course. We're not going to tell you what it is, though. |
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//Second-Story Emergency Inflatable Airbags// (sp.
"Storey", unless for some reason that second bedtime
story constitutes an emergency) |
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It must be bad if it has them jumping out of the window... |
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My dad was a real second-storey guy. Nobody ever
believed his first story. |
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The distinction, of course, being between correct and incorrect spelling ... |
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<Anticipates fight over which floor should be called
the "1st floor" in 3...2...> |
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Explosive re-inflate rates? Just time the jump. |
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