h a l f b a k e r yVeni, vedi, fish velocipede
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Penalty shoot outs are always a gamble, I agree.But are they really random enough ? For me, a quantum sized football would add an extra bit of excitement to an otherwise thrilling event.
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How would you know whether you'd scored?
(later) If the ball is a quantum particle, and the goal represents a grating, couldn't you both score *and* miss with the same shot? |
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I kind of recall (it's a bit fuzzy) that you could know where the particle started and finshed but had no idea how it got there - i.e. which slit the photon passed through (if either/any).
So you could tell if a goal had been scored/saved but the kicking/saving bit would be rather confused.| — | lubbit,
Jul 06 2001, last modified Jul 07 2001 |
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Inexactly, surely? (Or unsurely. Or not. I'm confused. I think. Or...) |
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My God, what have I wrought? |
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God does not play Shrodinger penalty shootouts. |
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Not only does God definitely play penalty shootouts, but sometimes He confuses us by kicking the ball where it can't be seen... |
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If the ball suddenly appears in the net, how do you know it passed between the goalposts and the cross bar to get there? |
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That's a forehead-slapper, there, Mephi. Bring tears to the eyes, don't it? |
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Would the person kicking the ball need a quantum-sized
foot, and if so, how would it be attached to his ankle? |
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Just institute real-number scoring (as opposed to whole numbers, not imaginary/complex) and you're set. |
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I'd just like to say, it's about time someone else got a look in here. Why isn't it Heisenberg's Penalty shootout? What did Schrodinger do for experimental quantum physics(other than a couple of doozy thought experiments)?
Let's here it for Heisenberg, the real king of uncertainty. Or is he? |
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Im not sure?! For the sake of my sanity bring back Newton... (wait.. I dont have any sanity...nevermind) |
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If you're not thinking about the ball, does it really exist? Fishbone. |
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A true Schrödinger penalty shootout would involve lowering a huge metal box over the field, obscuring the view from the crowd, and letting cats onto the pitch. |
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The penalties would be taken inside the box, but no-one would know who won the match until the box was lifted. |
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Further, during this time, BOTH teams would have simultaneously won, lost, drawn and possibly been rained off at the same time. This is the point where the crowd gets most excited. |
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Once enough time has passed to provide a good probability of a result one way to the other, the box is lifted and the team jumping up and down with the most excitement is deemed to have won. |
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This particular practice was ended in 1952 after 4 Barnsely FC and Accrington Stanley players were stretchered off after putting on such exaggerated displays of excitement that they died on the spot of heart and blood-pressure related complications. |
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